Kategori: Natur

Simply having a multitude of experiences and the opinions that surround them has no real authenticity in human relationships. It is when we absorb them in our self-observation and then laboriously trace them back on our own to their origin and source that we discover the experiental patterns that their mental states create, in which we also rediscover the absolute human foundation of stillness and calm that we have within us. But not by suppressing them because then we can neither follow how we have applied them, do it now, nor evaluate them. We can then stop personalizing everything that happens that makes us capricious and restless because we no longer have to resist an abundance of impulses and impressions and constantly meet them with objections and aversion. We can simply begin to acknowledge them for what they are in and of themselves as they arise or come to us even though the experiences we encounter of these patterns and mental states have arisen in the relationships that people around us have with these same sources within them. But as long as we personalize them, we will be the cause of and inflict on ourselves and others all sorts of psychological and social suffering.

For me, stillness is what makes it possible to see creation as something we can formulate in our own words as something present and constantly ongoing in our own experiences of it. It is like watching and participating in how our psyche works through self-observation as it engages in an underlying community with others and exchanges content while occurring at the outer limits of consciousness at the same time. And formulate what is from that experience. It is like staring into the void and the ongoing beginning of everything. As in a constant repetition of something out of nothing. From this nothingness space emerges. Space is consciousness, and consciousness is energy. This energy enfolds the information which materializes in the mind and creates content out of the energy states that in and of itself appears as perspicacity from its formless sources. When the Information is perceived by consciousness, the energy is separated from its information and released into space which causes it to expand, which means that consciousness also expands as more and more energy is released into it by the information that is processed by consciousness in its relationship to space. In this sense, the content of space that our senses convey, and its inherent energy, is also everything we relate to in it. Everything is related to everything, and forms a context of energy that constitutes the experience of an amalgamation with the original whole in which consciousness is what we use in it to observe the parts that relate us to its source as it interacts with the content we encounter in there. There is no fixed state to be found separate from everything else, and the ego loses its individual significance of trying to exist on its own terms. What we refer to as personality becomes the growing sum of the experiences we have of the interdependent relationships this fundamental content encounters in our lives. Apart from the repeated sum of mental accumulations whose events contain the ongoing human conditioning of all time. Nothingness is something that goes beyond that, to that which is in and of itself in everything, and shows us the formless pattern of becoming we see as a primordial state of all possible ways of relating to the reality and emergence of nature in consciousness, in space and time, everywhere.

The nothingness we experience so intensely when we see it through our own nature can be extremely frightening to us if we are mentally completely unprepared for it when it appears within us. We think that everything is over when we encounter it in any of the relationships we have to the world around us, or to it as a whole. Not that it makes us see creation as something within ourselves and others independent of them and the wishes and demands we want them to fulfill for us so that we don’t have to confront it, and the change in our attitude to our meditative attention it entails. It is truly a frightening devastation it creates around the special position that the ego has had until this occurs within us. But at the same time it also draws our attention to the source of the act of creation itself, the underlying qualities that surround it and whose origin is defining for different psychological states of consciousness within us, and also to what the relationship looks like around us to them. We see clearly the meditative self-observational logic that surrounds it within us and that it imposes a task on us in our own personal relationship to it. Were it not for this experience, the pressure from nothingness in its relationship to the emergence and content of consciousness would be overwhelming and we would perish by it. The step to seeing nothingness as space itself, its expansion as consciousness, and approaching it with the logic of the psyche as an integral part of the experiences we have when we interact with the qualities that appear in our preconscious background, makes us also seek creation reflected through the content of the night sky and in a mixed version of psychic content with cosmic events, and is something we have done since the dawn of time. Although today it seems to be more about the energy that formulates its content than about the context and significance of the underlying objective content in relation to its internal order. Anyway, we can never escape the fact that where space ends, nothingness begins. Whether we see it within ourselves or as a cosmic limitation of all existence.

With every insight comes a definite psychic pattern of how we deal with its meaning and significance. First we experience the direct rapture and involvement, the applied thought and our evaluation of it. Then our confirmation of it as an inner assurance of the authenticity that our involvement conveys to us in our rapture. After that, a deep pleasure arises in our involvement before it completely transitions into an inner equilibrium and clarity and an unconcerned state of stillness and awareness. But that is not all. Here also arises the psyche experienced as a timeless infinity. Where consciousness in it assumes an indefinite ever-growing expanse in a tangible sense of nothingness. Devastating for our inner balance if we are not yet psychologically mature enough to face the ego’s identification with it, or we are forced into this experience in our life when we are not ready for it. But when we prepare ourselves to let go of our ego’s hold on it, through our inner maturation process, we see how our pattern of insight and perspicacity repeats itself over and over again until we accept how our mind works and our sensations gain their independence in relation to our conscious presence in it. We realize that it has never been about our ego, but about how we relate to the information it receives from sources beyond it. How we conceptualize it is up to each one of us, but to share them culturally we need terms that give us a reference to them that at the same time make it possible for us to face the intensity of the states that they create within us. That is why it is so important that we also have some knowledge of how our meditative technique is structured when we interact with our psychic logic. Otherwise we risk it being lost in the ego’s limiting identification with our psychic content. Still unknown to many, this process was documented thousands of years ago. It was collected in the knowledge of the different stages of the jhanas and their relationship to our sensations, and still constitutes a good description of how our mind operates apart from our bio-chemical analysis of it. When we perceive this in relation to our own experiences, to the objects of our senses, our emotions, our body and our body perception, it becomes clear that our ego is not what creates our psychic content. Rather, it is each person’s own relationship to the content that consciousness consists of. Furthermore, it is probably from the experiences we encounter here with our underlying mental properties and the psychic states they are surrounded by that our creation stories come from. Where they try to describe the emergence of consciousness from nothingness. Into the infinite space. Where the psychic energy is transformed through its embodiment of information as sensations, and its inherent energy is released as consciousness and it shapes the world from its dormant and formless preconscious primordial state outside of time. It is to continuously observe the creation as it happens within us. All the time. Anyone who works at the edge of consciousness and with the knowledge that arises there knows what I mean. Even though we are most concerned with what arises there in terms of how useful it is to the ego, and not in the psychic environment that provides us with our content. Which turns our inner maturation process and how our minds work into a health problem because most of us have no way to assimilate what we learn through direct experience or what it is that is constantly going on inside us other than in a materialistisk way.

Breaking free from the psychic sphere of conditioning that has shaped our early relationships up to a certain point in life is no small feat. At best, it has served us by granting us a state of belonging which provides us with a sense of security in social conventions behind an attitude of righteousness and faith in the upholding of society’s laws and rules, and condemn everything that does not conform to the customs and practices that control our conditioning in it. Whether it concerns individuals or groups living in it now or that have lived in it side by side for several generations. But what are we really driven to break free from by the challenge that forces us into an incredibly intense inner ordeal. For around us, we can simultaneously see what happens if we fail to do so. The pressure from within creates such an inner imbalance that we often have to compulsively live out our needs to change as our impulses make unpleasant interruptions in our otherwise impregnable attitude of the right kind of conduct. Without really realizing that it is the identification with the righteousness of our conditioning that we are trying to break away from, and the experience that we no longer belong to it, and thereby taking it upon ourselves to personify and answer for what is not permitted by the righteousness-based attitude. But that doesn’t mean we are bad, and that we have to personify the bad that conventionality bestows on us or anyone else. Often with good help from an uncomprehending and judgmental collective environment. Our conditioning can no longer assist us from within and exclusively be what guides us. We need to live through the tension that arises in our encounter with the opposite, that which questions our attitude in order to be able to formulate who we are in and of ourselves. If we cannot handle that tension and give in to it, it often follows that we not only violate social conventions but also the societal rules and laws that regulate them. We see ourselves as outside of them, and the ideals of righteousness that govern them. We can no longer see ourselves personifying the haughty one-sidedness it represents outside our inner person and without the psychic context and origin that we struggle with when trying to find our way back to the larger coherent and original sense of a whole. We all have it within us. But the majority of us will never change and will go to great lengths to try to appear worthy of the ideals of the common good in the belief that we are thereby always just good through and through. Which will contribute to the fact that the some people around them, out of pure self-preservation, if we are still young or psychologically immature, compensate for this by personifying what is rejected and question the content of the righteous attitude. Many will see themselves as inadequate, deviant and helplessly inept, which makes them personify it behind an provocative, hostile, or indifferent attitude that is derogatory towards both themselves and to others. Both are however a perspective that starts from how we choose to relate to the absolute foundation of our being. It is a relationship that is not determined by words and opinions which condition the connection and communication with our inner person in its psychic environment, but by a deeper relationship to the authenticity and inner stillness that is absolutely decisive for our ego and fundamental in the ongoing communication it has with our inner being.

At some point during our psychological reflection we will encounter the emergence of the mind-made body, a mentally visualized experience of the body that, due to the diminishing importance of the ego, begins to take precedence in our consciousness. It is experienced as an energy field, a template or a mental form for our body organising its biology. We begin to be able to read it while we generally also feel it in of all its separate parts. In the same way that we do it with our physical body if something is not right in it. We read the energy that surrounds a certain area or an organ to locate what makes us feel if there is something there that is not right. In the same way, we read the mental form that organizes and arranges the formation and functionality of our body which we mutually interact with as it do with us. We begin to see ourselves and relate to the world around us through it and perceive how this perspective affects us. The pre-formatted forms of perceptions in our preconscious psyche are opened up and the energy states they create lead us back to their origins. To the raw non-literal and non- material knowledge of life as experience. One way this approach has been documented is through meditative self-inspection, and in the practice of the psychic processes described by the jhanas in the Indian tradition of mental inner work, whose methodology, step by step, with observation, insight and understanding of the functionality of its conditions describes the psyche in relation to our impressions and impulses, which bit by bit reduces the importance of the ego and makes us aware of our mental form of the body and our interaction with it. Jhanas are living states that alternately merge into each other in our lives before we begin to be able to follow them as separate processes in relation to the body, our emotions, our senses and their underlying content, and observe them in and of themselves as interconnected parts of our mental life. Jhanas describes how the psyche functions in relation to the conscious content to which the ego relates us, and makes us aware of the inherent mental states that we, by merging with them, and become absorbed by, then leave for the physical becoming of our mental embodiment for our inner person. They create a kind of psychic balance of two different realities between them. Without it, we lack content and experience ourselves and others as empty or hollow. Our thoughts and actions are not based on our own psychological experiences but are filled in for us by others. When that happens, we turn into fathers to others’ relationships to their inner source and mothers to others’ meditative reflection and psychological content. To the emotional content that we provide them with from ourselves. It becomes our constant cycle of interaction. We cannot endure that relationship within ourselves, alone, and separate from others and yet together with them on our own individual terms. The only relationship that remains between us then becomes on the terms of the body and is mostly determined by our sexuality. Which turns it into a gender issue in relation to others instead of about the experiences we gain at the absolute foundation of our being and which we encounter during our meditative psychological reflection. We have opinions but no fundamental meditative experience of what it is. This seems to be the prevailing state of social life today. We give ourselves no time to engage in an active meditative psychic life reflecting on the terms that are determined by the preconscious content that influences our psychic states and accompany our actions from behind of our personal impressions and impulses. We just act them out directly and believe that we are expressing our uniqueness when we do so. Regardless of how they affect others. If we are in any way prevented from acting out our parental figures within us and replacing others’ communication with themselves, or are not allowed to replace others’ embodied psychic content of belonging and connectedness with our own, we react with resistance, reluctance and misdirected defenses, or with a suppressive compromise of our true inner needs, which makes us distance ourselves from each other and from the nature that unites us through self-observation and with our inner person through its experiential relationship to our consciousness. I have discovered that just by being aware of them within myself I increase my acceptance and allow for the opinions of others in terms that I don’t always have to relate to myself. It’s not about whether I can agree with them or not. I have my own independent of my inner parental figures’ functional ways of confounding them with others’, and exchange them together with others in their relationship to their inner selves if the conditions arise. I don’t have to try to share everything that happens between me and my person if our interpersonal connection doesn’t exist. It is not to relate, being someone else’s thought, emotion, or sensation. That’s identifying with the primordial wholeness. Instead of it being where we follow our inner person on its life’s journey.

Not many people I meet or associate with have given much thought to their consciousness. What it means to them or what its scope means for their ego’s relationship to it both in itself and to its content. But if we meditate or take an interest in our psychologically reflective logic, it immediately becomes something that we must relate to in our own unique way. Because in one sense it is a psychic place. An embodiment of the formless life we have in relationship to a larger psychic realm of life. In another the place where we store the ego’s relationships to our experiences. An interpersonal space where we encounter the world from within. A place which is empty in itself. It has two inlets. One comes from the relationship the ego has to our senses. The other from the relationship it has to our psyche and the inlet of the preconscious reality into it. The place we originally also come from before we entered this world. Together these inlets form a common constant flow in our consciousness. Mental events and phenomena originating beyond consciousness are then mixed with, and meet experiences from our five senses that the counterpart of our ego in the preconscious, the second center, or ”sixth” sense uses when their opposites encounter each other in our psychic life and unites them into insights for the ego to absorb in order for the scope of consciousness to grow by releasing and assimilating its inherent energy. Experiences that will ultimately also dissolve our conditioning. The ego’s way of habitually separating out what it wants to constitute as the totality of our conscious content. But if we identify with its contents, consciousness remains in its original state. Everything in it turns into temporary outbursts of an erratic ego that becomes defensive, restless and appears confused and unfocused as impressions and impulses turn into material objects without any context or affiliation beyond it.

It is a surprise to me that traditional Indian meditation techniques have long since mapped out and documented by practice what our capacity for psychic reflection looks like when we participate in it. First by calming our psychic activity down to the point that we can observe them in and for themselves, and then by focusing on their content and origin. Which in turn makes us participants in the processes that formulate us in an overall human perspective without reservation and over the entire span of humanity. We think that our knowledge of the psyche’s chemistry means that we know how our minds work when we use it. When in fact, it was described in detail a long time ago. By following our sensations and our thoughts in detail, and articulating our ability to absorb them step by step. Following them with a clear head, it allowed people to perceive a broader scope of our psychic functionality in those states whose characteristics lead us back to our psychic origins, to its underlying influence on how we perceive ourselves. How they relate us to the world and processes our sensory impressions and mental activity in it. They made it possible for everyone, based on each one’s personal conditions and experiences, to do so consciously in self-observation and in each individual state we experience on our way to a deeper understanding of how our psychic processes work and operate within us, for everyone who chooses to do so. With an understanding of the inherent procedural order that alternately affects and is affected by our lives and our life experiences, from which our insights are then formulated by our meditative presence. Many of them with origins that cannot be directly derived from our current lives but are something that has been latent and dormant within us waiting to be activated through our practice of meditation and psychological self-reflection. These can appear suddenly through bursts of perspicacity, visual impressions, in our dreams and in meditation. From these states can also emerge what affect us with an incredible intensity, which can make us begin to encounter them for what they are in themselves, and for the information they convey to us. Their emergence works in such a way that by giving us an experiential context for them, we can encounter them, capture their intensity and then follow them back into their preconscious psychic origins. But without an orderly process for these states, they simply become overwhelming and their real context and living underlying purpose are lost. We cannot absorb the energy that arises in our encounter with them. The contact between their origin and the information they convey is interrupted because we cannot endure their intensity and they are transformed into something untouchable and material. That is the natural reaction to what happens when the ego’s supremacy in our consciousness diminishes. It resorts to faith, animosity and to dead mental objects with no other affiliation than to the ego’s exaggerated view of its own importance outside the reality of our meditative life. Ultimately, this can destroy us, or we can end up harming other people because of the frustration our own meditative shortcomings generate, which then become psychological events that are only possible for us to follow through our demands and expectations on others.

When we are completely ignorant of how our inner father figure influences us in relation to people around us, this will come between us and others in a way that makes us try to become fathers for others’ communication with their inner person and its sources of psychic experiences in relation to our life. We constantly imagine that this relationship is at the same time our business and that we are to replace others with ourselves. We come between them and their inner family in their relationship with each other, and above all with the source of insight, perspicacity and communication that we have in an embodied sense together with its counterpart that creates context and belonging in the physical world as psyche, matter and nature. The conflict this creates within us is something we then repeat with others when we dramatize our shortcomings with this in our lives trying to establish them within us. To make this connection to our psyche a reality. If we are appointed by our parents to be fathers for their inner person’s communication with their inner source, we early in our lives develop an exaggerated sense of our own importance. In the same way that if we are to carry the relationship that our maternal counterpart gives us in the form of belonging and connection, we become mothers who by our maternal principle try to carry the need of others to connect to it from their experience of the psychic world, and replace the greater maternal influence they have of nature with our own, for them to have ours in the relationship between them and people in their own psychic environment. Without our inner parents in their relationship to our inner person and its contrasexual counterpart, a terrible confusion and psychic disorder arises. Which fills us with psychic stress, imbalance and anxiety. We have no fundamental security in the innermost foundation of our being. Or how to express it as mature beings. The relationship to the experience we have of a greater whole of which we are a part gets suppressed and lost since we deprive nature of its own inner source of knowledge and experience which turns everything in it into objects without content, into dead matter. In a sense, our relations will lack interpersonal content and becomes empty. This is why the realm of Sáivu was so important in traditional Sami life. It make us stop believing and begin participating in the experiential psychic content beyond our external senses.

When we are completely unaware that our mental actions have an origin other than the ego, we become selfish in the sense that all psychic activity is identified with the ego and its need to control that activity because everything that happens outside its control questions its dominance in relation to the activity around it. The psyche then becomes personified in feminine form. When we see our psyche as something in itself and in relation to the ego, the psyche becomes soul and the formless experience we have of it as something we share with everything else in some form of its content and as an extension of our interpersonal psychic reflection. At the same time, we discover that the origin of its content has several other sources than we were previously certain of. We reach into that where all psychological processes and life experiences take place. Which in the old Sami tradition was described as a relation to Radien niejta/Saivo niejta and theirs to Rádienáhkká. Soul in this sense becomes the embodied content in which we personify our experiences of the larger scope to which this is a relation. Both in an earthbound and in an underground preconscious meaning of psychic life as a whole. An experience of a larger whole where perception is particatory and actively involves all beings in each other’s existence.

One thing about our existence is that we have a relationship to a source we experience as inspired intelligence which acts completely independent of the ego upon us. Ever present and dormant in and of itself until it interacts with our lives and creates information of psychic experiences. A kind of ordering psychic principle that unites opposites with insight that seems enveloped in energy and erupts spontaneously when we are stuck in a state of repetition, empty words and concepts without any apparent access to our preconscious underlying psychic flow as a connection to the content of a larger coherent whole, or the eidetic forms whose presence creates belonging to it and makes it available to our consciousness. A part of this androgynous whole communicates with the source of what we call intelligence and knowledge in the form of insight. In a cultural sense, it comes into active expression through our inner eidetic father figure in its cultural relationship to our inner person. When they are confused with each other, we get a father figure with qualities that do not belong to it but to a deeper more complex formless experience. We begin to relate knowledge and insight in the form of a father to this source beyond him. Or to this psychic source of insight as to a father of that not only to us but to others as well. We create an exaggerated view of our own importance. To something that our inner person should conveys to us. If I use an older phenomenological language for the inspiration that psychic events of this kind are, it would be that we turn to our surroundings for them to be like fathers to this inner unifying principle of perspicacity, or god. If they should fail as inspirers of this knowledge, then they are false and we behave as they are something we should just deny and get rid of. But it is not the relationship we have to this source that is wrong, or how we express it, it is our ego that identifies itself with them. We make them properties and states that do not occur independently of the ego in and of themselves, to something that the ego itself claims to be the original cause of. But the relationship to the insight and knowledge the ego receives in our consciousness and the inspiration this conveys is coming from a living and spontaneously occurring source beyond it. Deeply rooted in nature itself and in the contexts and affiliations that the counterpart to it in the androgynous whole conveys to us in an embodied way. The ego’s confusion, its narcissism and irrational behavior appear when they are not objectively present in a self-observing way, and if they have been lost to us in others, or something we have learned and been conditioned to by undeveloped fathers and mothers in their inability to express them early in our lives. One thing is certain, if we are ignorant of this, we will make people and things into materialized fathers for the inner spontaneous source of inspiration we relate to in many different ways as a connection to this second center, nexus or traditional image of a supreme being regardless of how we choose to describe the insights and forms of psychological context that this source expresses in a cultural sense. Just by writing this down, I am listening and following many different branches of this indefinable communication that emerges with it as it guides my inner person along them and brings my thoughts and sensations to an intended conclusion within me. This is something that always happens within us at the same time as it also lead us back to its elusive origins. Which is impossible to achieve with just the ego alone.

A kind of psychic conjunction occurs at a certain point in our life where the energies of the involved eidetic references we use to describe our experiences are in an alignment where they blend their impact on us and amplify each other. This happens as they are eclipsed by the ego which shadows the original wholeness and distort its influences and creates a kind of black sun. Something we can call a psychological black hole event. This event makes it possible for us to look straight into it, close to its event horizon. We can begin to observe the space that surrounds it without damaging our eyes. By maintaining our distance from it without getting sucked into it, we are observing the impact it has on us through meditative self-inspection, and we can see more clearly and deeply into ourselves. That in turn makes it possible to penetrate much deeper into this psychic space behind the ego and close in on what it up to now was that was hidden behind it. This opens up a path for us, a kind of journey into how our experiences are made to happen by psychic conditions prior to the actual events and we get a glimpse of their origins and independence of our ego. We have then made it back to our original sense of a whole as adult people to continue our common work to mature from within in our relation to nature and its underlying preconscious space in and of itself. It means directly and unknowingly allowing oneself to be exposed to raw unprocessed psychic experiences and events as they are, not trying to control them in a literal sense, but observing them, their energy, and the information they convey to our consciousness in the form of the experiences they create as they interact with our lives. Something that also causes our consciousness to expand.

We all express a kind of confused personified mixture of the objective content of inspiration and the relationship to it as psyche: on the one hand as an indeterminate experience-based, transient communication with our impressions and on the other as impulses that function as an erratic and spontaneously fascinating spark of a psyche that behaves innocently in relation to what it contains. They appear within us as an androgynous mixture of qualities that mix up the world and nature with the world from within, with nature in and of itself. Everything becomes one in the original whole that we seek to return to as adults by trying to free ourselves from the tension and pressure that emerges between them in their opposites within us. From a traditional Sami perspective, we experience Radien nieita and Saivo nieita as one together with Radiengiedde. The psyche and the world leave their materialized and dormant relationship to their content as if they were one and the same thing within us, and become experienced as separate in a formless experience-based state of inner community and outer belonging. United in the communication of Radien giedde with the underlying intelligence and order conveyed by Radien-attje and the deeper connection to the world that nature Radien niejta/Saivo niejta has to Radienahkka. They are transformed into the psychic content of the world that we encounter as something both within ourselves and everywhere around us seen and experienced from within, through those who provide us with it in the eidetic portrayals we use, to give our experiences both meaning and content in our lives.

For me, this second opinion within me, this intelligence and organization that it brings about through the union of opposites, is the unifying psychic principle and source that in an embodied sense is encompassed by a sense of wholeness that gives meaning to the insight it conveys. At the same time, together they bring about a deeper union between the contents of my senses and the Nature of which they are a part. Which makes it possible for us to directly relate to the experiences that arise from them in other people and to encounter them there beyond the eidetic representations they generate which make them accessible to us in our consciousness. It is nothing that the ego is the origin of. It is not the ego that creates consciousness. At best, it relates us impartially to its content. Which means that we can face what emerges outside of it and our consciousness in an open, authentic and unreserved way. Since consciousness consists of the energy that surrounds the information that is released through insights conveyed to us from beyond it, which causes consciousness to expand, we may even conceptually refer to these processes in contemporary terms as something like quantum psychology. However, this is not possible to comprehend as long as they are unconditionally united with our inner parental pair and our ego simultaneously identifies with the significance they have for the communication between them and the cultural community they create in relation to our direct and unconditional psychic experiences beyond our eidetic images of them. Relationships, thoughts, feelings and sensory perceptions are then regarded as literal truths and seen only in terms of unshakable material facts. The maturity that a renewed contact with the original whole entails for the context it conveys has not yet emerged in us. Our senses and Nature are still experienced as one and the same thing through our identification with our impulses and impressions. Not as the physical and embodied commonality they imply for us in an inner deeper and morally direct sense, in relation to all our relationships experienced as parts of a greater coherent whole of life. In Sami, people are related to this whole in the sense of meahcci.

At a certain point of meditative psychic inspection, everything becomes formless. We encounter our sense perceptions as they are. Our inner family is still there on an embodied plane but without the influence it had there from the beginning. Instead, we discover the character of the formless driving force that exists beyond them that we perceive as intelligence, as ordering, and as our inner movement. That which conveys insights as it encounters events in our lives. The nature within which our experiences are created of, which shapes and embodies them as they figuratively relate to us as belonging and context. It is this that formulates a kind of inner search for the source of the underlying order we see in ourselves as we identify with the psychic logic and intelligence within us that we try to rediscover in everything around us. My ego is not intelligence, it is a relationship to a formless quality beyond that which formulates my sense impressions so that psychic experiences in relation to their source create an inner underlying order in my life by their occurrence. Nature is an ordering process that I am part of. Where my sensory perceptions form a relationship to it as a whole and to the information that we perceive as instructions that form its underlying unifying function. Something we perceive that is in everything, that separates everything when we identify with it but always holds everything together in a atmosphere of wholeness. We begin to see ourselves in a metaphorical psychic field of energy that holds together all that exists in a dynamic and formless psychic experience of life. It is when we confuse this with someone elses, and they are doing the same thing, that we experience that we have been deeply wounded at the foundation of our being early in our lives. As if this intelligence and ordering principle were something that belonged to the ego and it could determine for others how they should relate to it in themselves. The undeveloped or immature mind personifies it and identifies it with our inner eidetic perception of a male parent, which transforms the ego into an uncompromising authority instead of a social and collective expression of the formless source of psychic logic we refer to behind the processes that are constantly going on in our nature and that organize our meditative inner life with a deeper support from the experiences that are conveyed to the ego by our inner person. We will always be deeply hurt if we expect our own relationship to it to also be assumed to have the same content as others’ between them and themselves. We share this background, its organizing inner principle, and its intelligence. But how it causes our consciousness to grow through insight and psychic maturity is our own, and differs between us even though they include that the communication that meets events in our lives has the same psychic origin. It is a deeply personal abuse to try to replace the communication between others and themselves with our own. Yet this naive and immature approach is the prevailing way of trying to control that we retain our own first and undeveloped relationship to our inner sense of our original wholeness. All the conflicts we see around us are this conflict within us staged to recreate some kind of version of it. This first and original psychic reality is so fundamental within us that we do not see or consider the results of our actions, no matter how terrible they may be. From this perspective, news outlets and opinionated social media can also be perceived as almost incredibly uncomprehending to our psychological reality, and the mental actions they result in. By just paying attention to the results of our mental actions, not their origins within us, we do not get closer to our psychic reality or find what is genuine and authentic in our being, nor will it change what they do to our world when we stage them there.

At some point in our lives we return to the pristine place where the space of consciousness once emerged from the ever-present but dormant emptiness. But when we do so as adults, as our being matures, we also encounter all the psychological attractors that have influenced us, as they have interacted with us from this background in our lives. We also discover that once they have done so, and created the states in which they have made themselves present through the tension that arises in their active presence, they have also created experiences of the insightful coincidences that arise within us as they encounter our reality in the meditative self-reflection we have of our sensations, impressions and impulses and we slowly absorb the energy through our endurance, causing our mindfulness to expand, only to then retreat into the emptiness from which they arose if we endure their presence long enough. From time to time, however, we must always release them back into this background during our encounters with them until we can face them without losing our heads. Our inner balance and mental health depend on it. The fabricated characters whose attitudes we have put together to satisfy how we think others want to see us, then transform into the perspective we need to be able to see how they contaminate the content of the original whole within us, and the authenticity with which its activities relates to our inner life.

At first emptiness is a strange feeling. Although it is a constant but dormant activity in the background where our conscious space resides and our experiences of it are transformed into psychic matter and mental actions that interact with our lives all the time, creating experiences before retreating back to its original state, even if it is something we do not always observe or even pay attention to. Most often it seems that it is something that never really reaches a conscious level, but only affects us when it is perceived in its unprocessed forms of impressions and impulses without contact with our relationships or with the inner family that forms a context for our first relationship with our inner person’s relation to it, by which we also percieve it in its original psychic state of wholeness and in a peace of mind that it conveys to us as it exert their influence on us outside the directly experiential world around us. The tragedy of this is that no real person can fully possess all the qualities of the people in our inner family. That is why we find their real significance in the interpersonal or psychic sphere, and the dramatization of our relationships with them in relation to people around us. In unspoken demands, wishes and expectations that no real human being can fulfill without going far beyond the limits of our own personality at the expense of our inner balance and mental health. Which are mediated by our impressions and impulses that we immediately stage and act on when our minds are still not mature enough. When we are young or still psychologically immature, we experience this only from the frightening perspective of the emptiness and on the personal level of the ego, on its identification with our staging of our inner family. Our experience of them is through our physical parents and siblings. Then through our girlfriends, boyfriends, wives and husbands, and in people we look up to beyond them, who are transformed into the references we need to be able to handle the raw intangible experiences, whose psychic impact on us goes beyond all personal conceptualizations of them in our communication with the underlying preconscious states that convey the fundamental experiences we have of the foundation of our being. A much deeper context we obtain for the most part in nature as an embodiment of it in an inner comprehensive and universal experience of wholeness, together with the underlying communication that constantly takes place between us in relation to the source of information and directions our inner person is an intermediary for, and transform into psychic matter. Here is where the absorption occurs that makes it possible for us to take in the events we discern from the content of what this emptiness creates in our consciousness, where we can see ourselves through the experiences we have in our eidetic perceptions that form the relationship between the underlying stream of sensory impressions, impulses, thoughts and feelings, and our life. Beyond them there are no objects, no thoughts, just plain experiences.

If I were to let my ego also be the underlying stream of consciousness that at every moment follows every mental state and its process, I would go crazy. To a certain extent we are conditioned to do so because we try to adapt it to the expectations that the environment has of how we should be and behave. Not how this undercurrent’s relationship is to our inner person in its own relationship to it. But if we are it, if we identifies with it, then we are constantly being thrown around among sensations, impressions and impulses in a more or less arbitrary order without them having any direct connection with our person as a whole. It becomes fragmented and without a coherent relation to a psychic structure that gives it an inner connection in relation to its parts and a fundamental belonging to its creative source. We feel crowded upon and become stressed, anxious and irritated. But the underlying stream of consciousness is not ours to be. It is something in and of itself independent of the ego. Its original function is to provide consciousness with the information that arises in its encounter with events in our lives and to create experiences from it by means of the conditions that attractors create behind our mental processes that consciousness is then drawn into and get absorbed by, before withdrawing again when they have served their purpose. Otherwise it turns into a ”monkey mind”, constantly chattering if the ego identifies with the underlying stream of sensations and impressions where it tries to find ways to adapt it to its environment in its attempts to control it. But our identification with it confuses our ego, overwhelming it with intentions that do not belong to it, causing the stream of the preconscious mind to lose its context and create chaos outside of the original relationship it has to the content that we interact with through psychic reflection in a meditative sense. We will end up in a constant inner war with ourselves. Something that we then stage for people around us.

War is murder. In the same way as those committed in peacetime. The only difference between murders committed in war and those committed in peacetime is that the person who is subjected to the murder in war is assumed to have the right to respond to the murder with their own murder without it being considered murder. In this way, all murder is given a moral right in war if any party is considered to have been subjected to the murder they themselves commit. For which murder they then absolve themselves and are not to be held responsible for having committed either in a moral or legal sense. And so people can give themselves the right to repeat the murder in all eternity as long as it serves the trauma that is dramatized within them by others, and it at the same time serves the higher purpose of this drama. For example, to recreate the lost wholeness and its content that we related to when we were young and return to as adults in meditative reflection as the inner work that is required to regain the inner balance that the original wholeness once gave us. A longing that is experienced as an original paradisiacal, cohesive wholeness and belonging that we were once a part of and have lost. In that way, we are all responsible for our own encounter with the impulses in and of themselves, and the impressions that accompany them within us. So right now there is very little hope that anyone will dare to change. Because what constantly separates us from that experience is the idea of ​​the content of our mind and the qualities of the conditioned ego. This belief in the idea of ​​”me,” this experience of ”mine,” everything is about ”me.” These are ”my” things, this is ”my” idea, this is ”my” feeling, this is how ”I” feel. What ”I am”, this is ”my” body, this consciousness is ”my” consciousness; this exaggerated and fabricated sense of the composition of what ’I’ am, and its external drama of what we build around this idea of ​​me, and the people who follow this me of others to avoid what is playing out of it within themselves, that then turns people into cattle. It’s about a perspective. Not from our fabricated perception of our psychic makeup. But from the deep authenticity that the foundation of our person experiences in relation to the space, or emptiness from which consciousness and its relationship to the whole consist.

The fundamental feeling of having been rejected and deceived at the very core and foundation of our being has arisen when our environment’s relationship to the impact it has on us early in our lives has become distorted and denied in and of itself. As something we have a constant interaction with and is an absolutely present reality for us from an inner perspective. Like the empty stillness and creative peacefulness it represent in the sense of the original wholeness. From a survival perspective, we are forced to choose the conditioning that it means to adapt to it in order to obtain a context that gives us belonging and security early in our lives. But it also destroys the relationship to our original being in the sense of the authenticity it conveys to us regardless of the denial and indifference of an environment to it. We discover early on a clear and unreasonable dissonance between psychological events and the impact they have on people in our environment and how they behave in their relationships with them. Which causes them to behave in an emotionally and morally distorted way that, based on their behavior, cannot be made to be based in their own essence. But appear cognitively inhibited and undeveloped in relation to their own sensory perceptions and to the impressions and impulses that arise within them. Which causes them to act as if they posed a threat to their person by questioning their fabricated view of what they are, and how one should be in relation to this. Often through others because our psychic life is awakened and interacts with others in a way that makes us feel helpless in the face of our loosely composed personality and the underlying psychic factors that act on us from there.

If I imagine the whole I perceive myself as a part of and see it as a coordinate system in order to be able to orient myself in it, then the points in it will be the events that in and of themselves occur in the space that the coordinate system depicts. If I then experience these events as energy pulses that form experiential individual states of varying intensity in this whole, then each point functions as source of individual clearly distinguishable and deviating patterns in the surrounding field of psychic energy, which then in turn is what will constitute and fill the entire space of the psychic whole I am part of as an observer of the states that arise from the latent underlying psychic energy of the whole. In this way we use mathematical images to reference and describe distortions as events in the psychic space and the underlying whole that consciousness tries to take part of and orient itself in. As a larger composite quantity or at a more complex level of the smallest elements of existence as they interact with each other, these impulses shape individual experiences as they are formed, and then release the energy bound within it when we pay attention to it and allow ourselves to be absorbed by the information it encapsulates, causing consciousness to grow and expand. This is where the notion of a quantum-based world serves as a coherent picture of reality. Which is in line with the experiences we gain during meditative mental reflection. We also refer to it as psychic maturity when we can perceive this outside of a chosen coordinate system and describe it directly in the psychic reality we find ourselves in. To me, this represents a way of understanding physical experience and psychologically-based reality on a personal level, as a ”Grand Unified Theory”.

The encounter with the emptiness in which consciousness expands through the information that is packaged in the psychic energy we refer to as sudden insight, and as something that originates outside of consciousness, in the emptiness, there is also something conditioned and ingrained deep down in the core of our being in the feeling of, who will help me? Who supports and contributes with the guidance I need here? Who looks after, and confirms the states that arise from the sources that are fundamental to the experiences of what I go through and absorb independently of others. Where were those people when I needed them. For a long time this feeling of abandonment lay hidden in me, dormant, almost imperceptibly linked to the emptiness. When I was young and encountered it the first times, it was the ultimate hopelessness, a total meaninglessness and an inner source of intense psychological suffering I found relief for in nature, and in a speaking relation to a greater wholeness I related to in it. That meant that I learned early on to listen to those who helped me from there. The inner figures we use as references to thoughts and emotional states that we unconsciously transfer to our outer social and cultural environment. But before we meet them as figures in and of themselves, we see them in girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands and wives, grandmothers and grandfathers, great-grandmother and great-grandfathers. In short, as external representatives of our inner family. Our Sáivu family. But together with others, that space of the mind was not a peaceful fundamental state of meditative psychic reflection, but was instead associated with the feeling of abandonment. Since I was safe in my solitude and in nature, I then came to equate the emptiness that provides consciousness with content, with abandonment when I was with others, and later when I understood better, the freedom it also meant, with betrayal. Of being exploited in my relationship with them and deceived by their pretense towards nature and the unreservedness it means to have it. This is so deep within us that most people don’t even realize where their frustration and resentment comes from. We just are what that is. There is no inner fundamental stillness and peace of mind. Just an uncomfortable sense of abandonment that has to be taken care of all the time since it interfers with our relationship to the world around us. Then we also reluctantly discover that the rejection we perceive is not only in ourselves, as we have previously seen it through others, but our own rejection of our experience of the peaceful emptiness, but also the transformation of its content that occurs outside the ego in our consciousness, and in the same way also in others, independent of their egos. But it is our ego that conveys its content to us. For it is not the ego that is the original source of the preconscious content beyond it and which, when it encounters events in our life, transforms it into experiential insights to our consciousness. There is an active space with its own characteristics beyond the ego that does that for us.

When I was 27, I had an overwhelming vision that stayed with me for three days. It was so intense that I could not bring myself to do anything other than be in it and let it fade away by itself. In its wake followed the insight into the perspective that the experience of emptiness implies for the ego and for the content it relates to in consciousness. But before that, I had been forced to face the feeling of emptiness that preceded it on several occasions. Which, until this meeting and the terrifying experience I had with it before, had thrown me out of myself and made me bury myself in studies, sports, and work. All to try to avoid facing it again. The duality our consciousness and the emptiness beyond it form together horrifies the ego as it is confronted by its diminishing significance in relation to the content that independently arises outside of it in our consciousness. Emptiness is the first intense experience of this but it is not emptiness, but that which exists and acts on us from beyond the ego. The ego’s first encounters and identification with it is a feeling of total obliteration, an intense feeling of meaninglessness. Of darkness and the absolute unknown. For the ego an experience that it must be like death itself. Even though we afterwards understand that what we experience and work with through our psychic reflection is the ego’s relativization, and a renewed perspective that once emerged from our primordial relationship to the original whole. But the first encounters with the emptiness that the ego have and identifies you with are extremely destructive and intense. So if we encounter them without knowing what it is or if we are not yet ready to face it, there is an obvious risk that we will perish. We will drown in the power of the experience of it because the ego sees it as something that belongs to it. As if it is something that arises through the ego in and of itself. Not as something that relativizes its importance. With time and with the experiences we gain from this encounter repeated, we will endure it better and better. As with other intense psychological experiences we have had and do, both pleasant and repulsive. But the relativization of the ego in ourselves stands out as the most central and the one that also causes us our deepest suffering. Before we come to a reconciliation with the relative importance of the ego in relation to our consciousness. I have also come to realize that it was this experience and its meaning for the ego that led to the death of a person close to me. But also for others who, out of a feeling of hopeless resignation and the sense of meaninglessness that follows from it, are led to expose themselves to circumstances that can ultimately destroy their lives. Without the relativization of the ego, and this experience of the emptiness, in and of itself, we cannot find the privacy and stillness we need for our relationships with the true bottom of ourselves, and the preconscious space whose independence from us we share with everyone else. Even though most people shy away from it and stage their suffering outside of themselves, to make what goes on between them and themselves something they can control as if it belonged to someone else there. As every child within us would do when it does’nt know what is going on within them, or what they are exposed to, when the ego is not developed enough to initially stand its ground when this profound experience hits it. In order for us to be able to do this, we must learn to suffer and endure the intense process of this experience as it is. Something we do through meditative mental reflection. Unfortunately for many, so few actively acknowledge these experiences, and choose to go through them in a way that allows them to confirm that it is something that has great significance for everyone who ends up in them. This means that many will feel betrayed by their surroundings and realize early on that it only refers to words without any underlying experiential content, and to the conditioning this constitutes for them, without the experiences that influence and shape us in relation to them, and that people we feel dependent on or drawn to are letting us down. They are still dependent on it in a politically and religiously declamatory, authoritarian, aggressive and violent way which defends one’s own personal control over this conditioned content because of the fear it entails of being overpowered by the emptiness and contents of the preconscious mind that we find behind it.

There is something within us that in a meditative sense is called the experience of the inherent impermanence of existence. Observable in the smallest parts of matter and life, organized and interconnected by the information that coordinates and creates increasingly complex living environments from it and that functions reciprocally at all levels. But here are also certain parts of our consciousness that we repeat, their origin, that which constitutes our conditioning. Like when we don’t accept that everything is temporary and in constant change. Which, when we get stuck in them, create the conceptual boundaries and thinking that cause suffering. Boundaries that we can only cross when consciousness has released enough of the inherent psychic energy that causes it to expand through the information conveyed in its energy. We then discover that it is not only us who are referencing thoughts. It is also done for us, as part of the expansion of consciousness. This then involves a rather frightening experience of the diminishing importance of the ego, because we begin to see consciousness from a new underlying perspective. And this is the loss of its identification with the conditioned way of relating to the content of consciousness because there arises a space that develops between them that creates a sense of loss, a loss of its content. Initially, it is a completely annihilating experience. We feel empty and disoriented. When this first happens to us, the ego loses its significance which evokes a deep sense of meaninglessness. But the very depth and breadth of that emptiness is the very foundation of our being. The real discovery of the relationship to what exists and emerges within it and which creates the content we relate to from it as consciousness. When we have endured the turbulence and confusion this initially creates, after a while it establishes itself as a perspective, a meditative peace of mind at the absolute inviolable foundation that the emptiness first was within us. The emptiness is then not some kind of hopeless experience that only generates mental illness, it is a perspective and a renewed attention to the true reality as it is. Without the conflict and suffering that our conditioning in its limiting scope of human depth creates in our relationship to what consciousness really is. In other terms, as I have recently learned, this also corresponds to the meditative experience we initially have of the three characteristics of existence: of anicca, anatta and dukkha.

There is always a tension and conflict in having the relationship between the concentrated source of constant renewal and coordinated focus of realization that we communicate with within ourselves also in relation to our surroundings, together with its counterpart which encompasses it in a larger context as a natural psychic whole and in a composite sense of belonging with nature itself in all its parts. Because together they form a union and opposition to how we mentally try to exemplify and limit our person through overly restrictive and loosely composed contexts of knowledge, which form standards that are held too general to also be able to function and apply to our entire personality, and those aspects of it that act on us regardless of the conscious control we try to have over it. Such a perspective cannot support an objective standpoint which relativizes our experiences and brings us closer to the meditative correspondence we have to the independent impressions, the flow of thought and impulses which independently arise between us and ourselves when our senses interact with the world around us. Even more so when we do not include our sixth sense. The sense organ that we, in addition to sight, smell, hearing, taste and touch, associate with the body, which constitutes the flow of thoughts that act independently on us in the sense that we are not their true origin. We are not the origin of a sound in itself, or a taste. We experience them. As we do with all of them. What I call myself, or refer to as my personality, is then the sum of the experiences I have had of how my objective psychic actors have been able to interact with, and how these characteristics have been received, while adapting to the environment they find themselves in. All forms of visualization of this greatly facilitate our personal relationships to the raw, unprocessed experience we have of them. But to make it subject to an exclusion of how we individually shape our relationships to their origins within ourselves, without our own personal experiences of their original sources, is simply psychologically destructive. So it takes immense courage to face our own unprocessed experiences without transforming ourselves into those who do not allow others to have theirs in relation to themselves. Which is the conflict we all carry within us and often stage so that others can deal with it for us, and which we then can blame them for that we have not yet resolved within ourselves.

I find it extremely important to be able to internalize our social structures in relation to our inner parents so that they in turn can mediate our communication with the psychic whole and its embodiment of the underlying preconscious forms in whose flow our inner person and his counterpart find meaning, belonging and context. Without our inner parents’ mediation of this content, and of the psychic realm of life, our inner person loses contact with the inner order of its cultural context and its central source of constant renewal within us. In addition, our inner sense of meaning, and of belonging to a social and cultural structure whose order has its origin in the communication that arises between us and ourselves in relation to the context in which we find ourselves, and we can express it, gets lost. Many of the defenses that builds up early in life as an aggregate of frustration which often also turn into pure aggression, arise in that conflict within us as the lack of being able to have this relationship to ourselves unconditionally, and also acknowledge it in others around us, in its cultural and individual sense. At its root, we have lost the stillness and the peace that is required to have an unconditional acceptance of our very being. Its a kind of self violation that obstructs and defiles our capacity for self observation and ease of mind. The old Sami experience of this clearly illustrates it on several levels. Which is also evident from the sectioning on many drums, or just as the original whole without any sectioning at all. In the center is always the sun, and also the central source of psychic energy and constant renewal that Rádienáhttje radiates. There is also Rádienáhkká, she who surrounds it and embodies it in the sense of belonging and the context they constitute in the whole that they together create through our meditative experience of them. But the drum always reflects the individual drum bearer’s relationship to it, and he or she as the one who use it as a guide, an oracle, and image of our psychic roots, by being an example of how we may use it to bring our psychic content into our life.

A child does not formulate mental processes, it resonates with them. They are identified with them. It is what they are. Similarily, when our inner person is undeveloped in relation to our underlying sources in the sense of the psychic whole, it is expressed unfiltered, through resonance. During our psychic maturation we learn to identify their various mental states and their underlying sources within ourselves and to formulate them in a cultural sense. Each of us will personally and individually interact with a certain collection of changing mindsets, their condition as determined by their objective psychic sources, and some of them will also become regularly repeated. How this preconscious psychic regularity transform into different mindsets determines the personality. Regardless of whether they are given by conditioning or are something that spontaneously emerges from our preconscious sources. But mindsets are not acting on their own, by themselves, they are states that change in intensity and alternate. Therefore, there is a need for self observational integration of both a formulation of the attractors behind them, and the states of information that they contain to provide our personality with a greater context, and a more wholesome consistency. At a level above the personal and preconscious relationships of which it consists, we find the psychic energy in its raw, unprocessed form. A level where our impulses and impressions are ever present but dormant in it. Until it is stimulated by events in our lives and observed by us in our meditative self-reflection. It is then that we discover the attractors in it that, independently of us, formulate the states that we then try to absorb in order to release the information they convey that is in their preconscious sources. It is when we work to release the information that is bound in the psychic energy and materialize it by giving it form and a language, that we, in a meditative sense, support the maturation of our relationship with our inner person and its relationship with the underlying preconscious psychic flow. It’s like a kind of natural concentration of the mind, all the time.

We can be part of any social order. Go to a job, any job, and there is always someone else who will also be able to do it after us. But regardless of that, we also have a relationship between us and ourselves there, between the human being within us, and the parts within us that operate in that relationship as a composite experience of a psychic whole. It is with us all the time together with the human being within us, and only we can have it and no one else. It is our own, and it is our task to take care of it. When we do not do it, we make it seem like someone else has to do it for us, and fullfill that task. Most often we do this by creating a suffocating atmosphere, a sense of emotional distance and poorly concealed intentional hostility, because we are not yet capable of the self-observation that allows us to carry that relationship ourselves. So just like a child, the undeveloped relationship we have with the person within us is projected onto our surroundings, and there we then expect it to satisfy the limitless expectations and needs it has, expectations that exceed our individuality’s unique part of the scope of the inner whole and the limit of our own personality. This becomes even clearer when we are completely oblivious of that relationship to ourselves as an adult person. We then replace it with conditioned frames of reference without regard to individual circumstances or individual needs. Everything that is of a different meaning is then met with hostility because it throws us into the unknown, fills us with anxiety, uncertainty and fear. Into the relationship to the whole we are a part of between us and ourselves, and the psychic forces that act on us in parts of that context. This is why we also experience social, political, and cultural aggregates as a kind of common collective composite form of psychic content of several individuals, and as an overall personality or group mind. The communication between us and our inner person is seen through others in the plural. Not as our own personal interaction with objective psychic properties in our experience of the inner whole in its original, undistorted condition. Something we should not confuse with insensitivity, or with the natural aggressiveness we need to maturely defend ourselves against its influence when it threatens the psychic integrity of the relationship we have with our inner whole. There is a reason why the rebel within us resists being flooded with ”bad karma”, of us becoming mentally contaminated by defilements before we are ready to face the psychic scope within which we discover our own inner person, and also the other parts of our composite structural whole with which it interacts, and which constitute our natural boundary to the outside world. The strength and intensity of the rebellion also seems to be directly proportional to the inhibiting effect of the condition of the ”karmic” influence. Whether we live it out, or it exerts its influence on the relationship between us and the parts of the personally perceived whole.

When we have access to the experience of the original whole, and the parts that act on us from it, we gain direct access to the inner coordinating principle of structural interaction it has with our inner person based on the parts in the preconscious origins of our personality. It is to have access to the absolute basis of the experience of being in itself. To simultaneously also be a part of it and its larger coherent whole. When we experience this, we also see our inner person as something in itself that has existed in man throughout all times in an original undistorted way. We then also begin to see other people as relationships between them and this primordial psychic experience our inner person relates us to. But also how others actions and conditioned ways of being relate to it independently of us, and in themselves, in that relationship. Since the further away from it we are, the more we need others to maintain the parts in it that we have once been conditioned to accept in ourselves, but it is also all that which was there before the beginning of consciousness, which has not yet been given its natural outlet. Or it has been separated, and is no longer allowed to occur as psychic elements in the relationships to ourselves that give rise to them in our consciousness. The defenses that arise against them are usually authoritarian and judgmental with a moral condescending overtone, but not only in an individual sense but also in the aggregation of personality as a group, as the personality of a collective, or an entire society. Mental stress, high tension, and aggressiveness are other symptoms of our being outside the reality of this belonging that is the foundation of our person. The need for firm beliefs and definite uncompromising frameworks characterizes it, because we cannot allow ourselves to recognize genuine human relationships as they are without imposing some frame of reference because it otherwise forces us to face what scares us in the encounter with the authenticity of our psychic life, and causes us to fall into the hands of that within us that we are not yet ready for. The experiences we have of our being between us and ourselves which we constantly and compulsively force others to reflect in parts of our own psychic properties, together with that which constitutes our own conditioning and the limited conditions that our loosely composed personality confine us to function in. We do not have access to the fundamental psychic existence that our inner person conveys of context in relation to ourselves and what his counterpart relates to as its scope. That’s why I think we prefer to see the evil that befalls us as coming from others, or as fate itself intervening in an invisible way in our lives and directing our actions. When it’s actually closer to home to see it in terms of karma and as a result of our mental actions, and our lack of us observing them.

Meditation or reflection engages us in the active psychic processes that are prompted by their preconscious origins and the direct impact they have on us when we notice them through self-observation. How we choose to illustrate them and interact with the content generated in our encounter with them is first conditioned by cultural beliefs and attitudes that our family constellations convey to us early on. Later, when our eidetic preconscious parental figures emerge so clearly that we distinguish them from our biological parents, the conditioned relationships to the preconscious contents begin to change through our self-observation and meditative reflection. As our separation makes our inner person emerge clearly in relation to our psychic processes and their origins, the outer collective cultural identity also changes, and our relationships to our inner life are reshaped and begin to take on older emergent forms of original and fundamental psychic sources. We then begin to relate to them in a way that corresponds more closely to their original, primordial functions, as we struggle to describe them in the way that they themselves, regardless of our collective identity, of the opinions of others, their conditioning, and their relationship to their psychic processes, choose to be seen and treated when we interact with them in our meditative processes, and in the direct raw experience that this content is for us. When we find our inner person and the authenticity and truth it provides us with, we also see humanity from this perspective throughout time. How we have endowed it with cultural and collective characteristics it does not possess in and of itself but with which we have distorted it. We begin to see with a different perspective the ways of all the generations that have preceded us. But with the same basic experience and feeling as if they were all here and now, in front of us. What the loss of this perspective does to them. Without us being able to do anything about it. We can only hope that they attend to it when they find it.

We are all entangled in a constellation of states whose psychic structure figuratively personifies the patterns our lives follow as they exert their influence over us, and we mistake them for mental properties beyond the boundaries of our own bodies. We then see them in others as belongings to parts of our own sense of a greater whole. Especially when we have not yet achieved any self-observation at all and our impulses and impressions are not perceived to originate in relation to our own psychic constellation. Where our impulses and psychic impressions becomes spontaneous movements disconnected from our conscious mind as something we must suppress in ourselves through others. Which we then ”boot out” and disposses as the unpleasant and evil we defend ourselves against in ourselves by way of our conditioning as we have transformed it into self-criticism. Historically, this constellation has also been transferred to the night sky and in our time to its inherent background energy, as we have attributed these psychic properties and the indirect influence the conceptualisation of them have on us, to fixed and temporary objects such as planets and comets in our solar system. But the vilifying part in today’s social life as a way of describing this psychic condition in traditional sami was that we have ended up in jabme aimo, a place of in between. A state and an intensely painful psychic place of becoming under the influence of Máttaráhkká in her dark capacity as Jahbmeáhkká. A psychic condition which is in sharp contrast to Máttaráhkká’s culturally mediating relationship of belonging and inhesion with Rádienáhkká in her embodiment of the preconscious eidetic forms and processes that emerge from behind nature itself when it unfolds its knowledge and information as we work to absorb and release it from its inherent energy. We begin to sense and apprehend the communication our inner person have with the underlying psychic guidance and inner order that unites all opposites in the all-encompassing center that is perceived in sami as Rádienáhttje. We otherwise limit ourselves too much, and risk our psychic balance and health when we restrict the original functioning and movement of our inner person, Rádien Giedde, in his relationship to them and to his psychological gender counterpart Radien niejta/Sáivu niejta with perfectionistic ideals that we with moral overtones try to personify through our conditioning to what is generally appropriate and accepted. Our conditioning, in contrast to our inner person, creates a kind of false and ever-changing personality with its own relationship to the content of our social or cultural context, independent of the psychic structure whose parts create the context that organizes the experience of a larger overall and original unity in the relationship to our inner sense of wholeness and to what happens within us in relation to it. If our narcissism or egocentricity pushing them too far apart and we, due to lack of self-observation, ignore their impact on us, we will eventually tear ourselves apart and our psychic health loses its natural balance between them. The importance at this point, of our inner parental pair for the experience of a combined psychic and cultural community where they together may function within the dualism we are confronted with, is crucial for us in our relationship to the underlying processes that affect us and involve us in our lives and cannot be appreciated enough. When they are expelled from their significance in the process of our psychic maturation, they transform into what is often called “the monkey brain.” They do not mediate the link between them and our inner person and his counterpart in their significance of being, in a cultural context, a direct communication to the source of meditative insight with which the original whole encompasses it. Instead, they transform beingness into an eternal compensatory chatter and a defense of the conditioning that their psychic reality questions.

One aspect of meditation and psychic reflection is that it is not often noticed how it illuminates our altered or distorted perception. Through self-observation we discover how our impulses and impressions within the body, our emotions, the mind and its inherent psychic properties affect and change consciousness at the very foundation of our perception. Especially when we see our preconscious properties through others outside our own frames of reference, and in an undeveloped state in relation to the original whole and its inherent parts when they interact with us without any real participation on our part. It becomes obvious to an outside observer how each of us acts within it in an incoherent and disordered manner without any communication with the structural properties of the psyche as impulses and impressions emerge with their own inner intensity in a disjointed manner, and without any coherent psychological context whatsoever. We may come to recognize it when people force other people in our immediate environment to correspond to a counterpart in this inner context and to act accordingly, outside of a certain persons own psychological frames of reference and in relation to the whole that we, within each of us, are guided by, and encompassed by in a fundamental sense. When we make this a normality, we idolize or devalue the qualities we do not yet see within ourselves but only see in others without any moral consideration of what the outcome will be for both ourselves and others around us when we transfer them. The result is how our personal world is shaped by our relationships to the qualities in this original whole, and how it has also shaped how the world around us looks in relation to it. We meditate and reflect on the raw experience of the psyche as we try to make it comprehensible beyond our conditioned way of habitually formulating the impressions we receive into conscious forms and words to please our surroundings. It is one of many ways we use to approach the preconscious psychic scope whose information, when it has found its original meaning, transcends the content of the stereotypical approach of consciousness and guides us to our unadulterated embodiment of it. It is not how we formulate it that is important, but the experience itself which in various attractive states, in information subsets of the original whole, acts on us. There all formulations of them become equally true and unadulterated in our attempts to find the preconscious order, the coherent psychic structure, and the context that it communicates to us regardless of the cultural descriptions we have learned to use to approach them.

As we move beyond the experience of an equilibrium between the earth and its embodiment of the underlying flow of preconscious forms of energy and its instructions as a sense of a primordial whole, which together create a presence in consciousness, we realize that by reacting to someone else’s defenses and their compensatory relationship to their inner person and by taking them on as if they were our own, we transform the psychic obstacles of others into our own self-criticism. Here is where we also move into the experience of nothingness. As in a state of emotional expulsion or exorcism in the mind and in the consciousness of the origin of the self-criticism. Self-criticism then becomes an identification of the conditioned defenses that others in our environment expose us to and have towards the relationship that exists within us all, between us and ourselves.

When we are able to focus on the activity that involves us in developing our psychic equilibrium, we realize that it, along with other things, is also a process of input into the present, fabricated by conditioning of the non-beingness and the raw experiences of psychic reality. Which, when the feeling of separation it creates passes into equanimity, one goes beyond it into a state of non-forming frame of reference and meditative practice. When we experience this, it is experienced as an ”entry into emptiness,” as empty of all that is not. Of what it is of what remains. We discern this as the present, and as a direct relation to ”that reality that is as it is.” No matter how unbearable it may have appeared to us before. It is now the absolute foundation of our being. The original whole and the states that it creates in all its parts are no longer dependent on what others can allow themselves of it, through the limitations we perceive of it in our surroundings, but qualities of ourselves in our own relationship to it in our meditative self-observation. Hence we also find this intermediate state of this vast and desolate feeling of emptiness that we experience beyond that in the transition from others and to our own entry into the independent wholeness we once experienced as our psychic origins when we were young.

Whether we are actively meditating or casually just happen to become subjected to it, we will have to deal with four frames of reference; the body in and of itself, feelings in and of themselves, the mind in and of itself, and mental properties in and of themselves. Which is another way to say that we in a meditative way have to come to terms with our use of them as a reference outside our own boundaries, or trying to confine other people to our own relation to them. Not as parts of a psychic content and a sense of a whole in its relation to our own being, to which it also formulates an individual relationship over time.
This in turn creates the condition of a specific state of psychic developement, and of the identity of mental objects, an experience conceptualized in india as nibbida. Very close to the sami Rota aimo, and to the concept of hell in christianity. An in-between state of an endless emptiness almost all of us experience in the transition from our childhood to adolescence and from adolescence to adulthood. But most importantly, the special insight it cultivates in our old age. In this sense, that is what old age means, it has a meditative purpose in relation to the previous scope of the body and consciousness’ frames of reference. Something that seems to become an almost impossible task, if life forces us to do everything at once when we reach our old age. It brings us into our need of seclusion, into meditation and psychological reflection. To come into contact with our being and to our sense of authenticity and wholeness. We just have to change, and begin to identify and face the parts of the fragmentation that emerges within us, and begin to communicate with the psychic content and duality that this second personality communicate within us. This urge is so powerful, that if it is not attended to, we become restless, incessantly acquisitive, violent and destructive. Committing reprehensible acts and atrocities against others without any genuine personal and moral considerations of our actions in a psychic sense, and we will even become a danger not only to our own life but to others too. We will just disappear into our preconscious life, overwhelmed by the challenge.

When we enter into it, it is experienced as a sinking into the absolute ground of being within ourselves, and in the confines of our body. Of what we are within the boundary that the original whole of its parts constitutes for us. Parts whose state and energy when they are met and understood actively share the insight they convey to us from the underlying stream of preconscious mental forms and processes that are the cause and reason for our existence. This is where I find similarities with the meditative concept of jhanas. Where we experience an absorbing, awareness and accepting of applied and sustained thought processes. A rapt concentrated state of well-being in the states that then gradually subside and pass into a pure experience of physical and mental equilibrium. An active state of equanimity. Almost like a step-by-step process, but in motion with its own internal order. A sinking into the body’s mental state of absolute attentive calm. Where each step is experienced alternately with each other, in intensity and presence as if to gradually relate to our ability to absorb them. Here is the fundamental communication our inner person has with the underlying preconscious stream that unites all opposites in the sense of wholeness created by embodiment, of belonging and connection which together constitute the cause and reasons for our existence. Without a conscious relationship to the intermediate eidetic forms we obtain in relation to the original wholeness we experienced as children, we will have great difficulties or not be able to return to it as adults, neither for the sake of our inner mental health, nor for that of future generations. Our psychic life will be experienced as uncoordinated and messy and without any inner order. There is no inner focus, and we do not have any conscious psychic self-observing relationship with each other. The most challenging thing is to accept reality as it is without falling into a state of aversion, disappointment, or disgust for worldly life by imagining the eidetic representations we have of our preconscious as something that determines how it should be perceived by others as well.

I have long had the ability to switch off the ”mind-door”. A kind of emotional disconnection of psychic energy and to stay within my own boundaries. I mean that in the sense of the content or form of the energy that people in my environment transfer to me, and I to them. This does not mean that I distance myself from basic human functions and considerations, but quite the opposite. I do it out of self-preservation. In order not to confuse the impulses and impressions that come from others with what arises in me. It not only makes me more present to myself, but others also become clearer in the relationships that this creates within them to me. In a way, it frees me from others in a way that gives them greater freedom to be what they are there, in themselves, for their own impressions and impulses, and in the self-observation that it can bring about. If such is produced in them, then just as in me, it creates spontaneous eidetic images and sensations with pre-psychic origins that our inner person does not produce by itself since it originates from a source beyond it. We can then share the states and experiences we have of the eidetic forms that emerges by dressing their forms in words, instead of trying to provide others with them through the psychic opposite states they create for us when we do so. Or imagine that the experience we have of our preconscious impressions is through their eidetic forms identical to everyone else’s. Which in its undeveloped naivety makes no distinction between us and others. When I was young, all these actors, states, and preconscious processes were in an inseparable whole where the psyche, nature, and the culture that surrounded me were a single coherent objective and psychic reality. Which unless we develop a conscious relationship to their intermediate eidetic forms remain in a dormant state where their sudden impact on consciousness is experienced as if they hijack its normal state with their inherent energy. Such a type of lack of self-distance and psychic self-observation is unfortunately the generally accepted and collective condition of it, since it is much more common to satisfy ourselves with our experiences of our psychic content by allowing others to function in the disguise and substitute of our personal relation to these preconscious and intermediate eidetic forms. Traditionally the sami related to this extended interactive psychic reality as Sáivu. That’s why I emphasize that it can be a sign of health not to constantly interrupt others and involve ourselves in their psychologically hijacked state of mind with our own, and instead give them room to come to the reslization of them by developing the function of active self-observation. Where we then pass from a state with rapture to a sense of psychic calm and presence with equanimity. A psychic space where we can turn to each other with kindness and consideration instead of with an impulsive, overwhelmed ego in rapture.

The great comfort we have within us. Along with the authenticity that the absolute foundation within us gives in relation to time, is that it always returns to itself. Regardless of the suffering we experience or inflict on each other, it is there. Dormant, resting, waiting. A hint here and a incursion there. We are at a place in time when it has become significant to us again. We have, in a collective sense, come to a crossroad where none of the external means we have used so far to resolve our inner contradictions and find our way back again work. Instead, we will have to return to it individually and within ourselves to experience it again for any real change to occur. For the influx of new energy into consciousness, and for its renewal and expansion, we must turn to its preconscious sources where the information embedded in their energy finds the expressions they need through the experiences we have of their individual formless meditative states. Both individually and collectively we experience difficult crises over time and its difficulties are filled with the tension of their opposites within us. But the only thing we can truly rely on is that the absolute foundation within ourselves is independent of it and of the time in which we experience it. It is by way of its nature we are being able to come to terms with our time and the history that has made it what it is. We can choose to seek our inner truth collectively over the hardships and suffering of several generations, or we can seek it individually, here and now. If we do it collectively, the change is slow and combined with a resistance in its inherent collective inertia consisting of the individual being seen through a majority and individuality in a quantity, which means that it will not achieve anything over several generations but will be under psychological preparation and negotiated with for a long time before it can be generally accepted, regardless of it being experienced individually and then presented in a safe figurative sense. What is the individual’s communication with our inner wholeness seen through the individual’s belonging and connection to a preconscious context, is not a collective experience because the absolute basis of all meditative experiences is always individual. Which is often what make changes occur to late, with tragic consequences from an individual standpoint. We can never force someone to pay attention to the experience of a whole they do not have access to. But we can, through its internal contradictions within ourselves, determine how we want our relationships to its influence on us to look like based on its absolute foundation in our being. It is ultimately against that source that we judge ourselves. Because it places the relationship to our bodies in a temporally limited relationship to the preconscious states we experience in it as states of a whole that goes far beyond it in time. Additionaly, that place and source have many intermediate connotations. In traditional Sami contexts it was referred to as Rádienáhttje, and the sense of connection and belonging that encompassed it as Rádienáhkká. They were the ones who, in one and the same sense, materialized psychic events, and united our preconscious processes and states, referred to as Sáivu in Sami as the genuine experiences acting on us in their relationship to our external contexts.

We miss something important and deeply essential in our lives when we do not realize that the background content of what we call imagination actually constantly refers to how we transform and materialize the formless preconscious experiences to which our thinking and concepts about them relate. When we share our description of those experiences with others, we call it culture. Just as the families whose psychic history in relation to our preconscious life shaped the concept of Sweden with their content, so there were many families outside of them that were shaped by a different way of referring to the content of our psychic experiences that held them together and united in a belonging where nature, culture and psyche were parts of a composite sense of community, that outside the formation of the Swedish state differed from the families that constituted it, and still do today. Because this preconscious content allows consciousness to extend our perspective far beyond our present time and into psychic time, where we find that people have related to this content, and applied the same life experiences of our preconscious psyche culturally under different conditions far back in the history of our ancestors, without this formless psychic content as an experiential psychic reality in itself having changed. In this way, it has a given context and continuity to our notions of what it is that has been stimulated to come to expression in our consciousness, and then formulated in relation to how people have collectively come to form a coherent relationship to this timeless content. This is a perspective we discover as consciousness’s continuous incorporation of the contents of the original whole and the ongoing transformation that occurs there by its preconscious sources’ close relationship to it, not something we experience from the ego’s limiting functionality and the conditioned personality it imagines itself to be for others and wants to be treated as. With the unwholesome results it has on both the way one’s own inner personality functions and how it then will affects others. In our constant sense of something being lost within us, we believe we are doing the world a favor by constantly trying to satisfy that feeling of discomfort. But in reality, we are trying to come to terms with the parts of the original preconscious whole that we once left behind and then constantly try to return to, but now as adult human beings without our primordial context and setting. In this sense, every state is in itself a collective and colonial notion, and its unifying function will therefore always psychologically operate with the authority of a colonial power. Any decisions made from its notion of a collective whole will therefore by definition be morally based on colonizing conditions. Therefore, in order not to be confused with the historical abuses of a colonial power, it should not intervene in people’s lives in this way. But for it to function and maintain its internal order, it must unite its members by supporting them with the basic needs they have, while also providing people with the trust it also needs for them to be able to accept it and maintain it among themselves in a moral sense. Ultimately, however, it is the psychic self-organizing principle we perceive in its union of the opposites within ourselves and in the original sense of a whole that, transformed, appears in a distorted form of concepts and ideas and not as the individual relationship it is between us, and to life as it is when we become psychologically mature enough to get involved in it. It has to do with how we communicate with our fundamental sense of belonging and connection.

Seclusion and the meditative concentration with its absolute presence in the psychic structure that follows from it have always been an important means for some people to gain access to, and be initiated into by life itself, to the underlying functionality of which everything is an experiential part. Which makes us abandon the made-up and conditioned personality we have put together for ourselves in the absence of what the content of our meditative seclusion teaches us about our psychic undercurrents, their scope and what significance it has for us since the content that is formed from the experience of it is personal but not the raw experience itself. It also means that we need to release the body from the tensions we have transferred to it. Relax and let our shoulders down and truly materialize in the tranquility we then fill it with from our minds. Most often, we are instead filled with the limiting and impulsive one-sidedness that makes us maintain every thought directly as it is without their individual significance for us in their psychic context and without self-observation. Through the seclusion of initiation and the rapture we first experience in it, their influence diminishes. When we allow ourselves to be embraced by the fundamental peaceful wholeness, or equanimity, our tensions, our defenses, and the intense and high-strung relationship we have to the maintenance of our applied thoughts are released. When we experience this, we are filled with a pleasant feeling of joy. Of belonging, and a deep bodily sense of union with the nature around us. Everything is united with everything else in a bodily sense that is also a moral belonging. This in turn will initiate us into the preconscious background that generates the formless experiences from which our psychic content is created. The rapturous spatiality that encompasses the underlying source that cultivates the mind and unites itself with the experiential reality is stimulated by it and we are gradually led back to its preconscious origin through the meditative insights we aquire along the way. The origin that is in everything around us and from which everything comes is realized when it becomes self-aware of its own formless origin as psychic content. We can find the traditional Sami concepts for these experiences in Rádienáhttje, and his wife Rádienáhkká. But still, beyond them exists the raw preconscious content that unites them, in intangible formless experiences of energy behind all life. We relate to them in different ways and describe them differently. Different people are also differently predisposed to seek a relationship with it. But regardless of this, the underlying psychic experience is the same for everyone, independent of how we try to convey our description of them. I also suggest that the experiences that Jhanas gradually generate in Indian meditation techniques are an effective and very condensated form of meditative initiation into the deeper structural functioning of our psyche and its relation to consciousness. If it is also based on having lived out some of its preconscious content and become captivated by it in our lives in a way that allows us to also encounter the experiences that prompted it when we turn inward and back to the primordial psychic wholeness, Sáivu, or nibbhana as adults. In any case, meditative practices in seclusion structures our minds whether we are aware of doing it or not, once we have been called to be initiated into what is happening within us. This knowledge and experience still exists in and around us, yet most of us are left helpless and empty-headed when it happens to us because important people we trust haven’t really understood what it means to experience the preconscious reality in a structured way. They can refer to it and maybe they’ve learned the terminology, but they don’t have the experience. So we end up in a disjointed, disorganized state with no inner context and no understanding of why it is so, until we seek the required solitude and become initiated into it. Regardless of the differences between different approaches to accessing the experience of our preconscious structures, the meditative one provides us with both the raw sensation of its processes and also clothes it conceptually with our notions of their influence on our lives. Which basically creates the cultural conditions we need early in our lives to access them, to the belonging, and the participatory context it creates. Our psyche and the nature we find ourselves in are in an embodied and changing community, intertwined with each other but yet experientially separate in our consciousness. This preconscious psychic realm of life acts on us like reality in itself.

One thing that adds to the disorder and confusion in our relationship to the preconscious psychic life is when our inner person, in old sami tradition Raediengiedte, through our feeling of inadequacy, seeks access to sources other than the one he is naturally associated with, and which in turn is the preconscious source that changes consciousness when stimulated by external experiences. Instead of being the one who mediates the contact to this source, and its relationship to consciousness, he is also given the task of maintaining contact with a variety of external stimuli that it is the task of the preconscious source to absorb and handle. The function of our inner person becomes fragmented and transferred to sources that it was not originally set to handle in a psychic sense. So we become confused by it and lose our inner context and the belonging he has to his original importance for our psychic balance. In this sense he represents an indispensable cause or condition of our psychic existence, and a fundamental type of consciousness that underlies our experiences that contributes to the emergence and expansion of the conscious mind. Another, maybe more contemporary way of putting it: When perception and incarnation are perfectly aligned, a connection to a reality of complete presence and equanimity arises.

It has always felt strange to me how my surroundings relate to what constitutes our cohesive personality. Because I myself have never perceived it exclusively in the sense of a certain form of study or how we practice it. I have learned to include myself in it from its social and practical significance, but outside of what it actually is to me in a comprehensive sense, by psychic reflection and self-observation. It was easier when I was young because then what constituted the psychic actors of the preconscious original whole was clearer not only in me. They related to them in a similar way in my surroundings as well through the original whole that it conveyed. The confusion arose when the contents of the preconscious psyche were not simultaneously allowed to have a cultural expression but were abandoned for the pretend personality that was only intended to perceive itself through something else, and beyond what gave them a belonging and a greater personal context for the communication we have with it as something in common with others. It is in the preconscious relationship to the personality that it is expressed in its parts through us, and we interact with it together with others, who over time give it an embodiment and the form that I like to call our personality. Without the larger totality of our being, it just becomes a limited concept we act out as children. We act it out without context and without self-observation on every impression, impulse and instinct that appears within us. We cannot yet perceive the underlying psychic context whose factors act in an independent way, in themselves through us. We perceive only the psychic event, not the original psychic agent that generated it. The personality then acts mostly in an acting out, unbalanced, and incoherent way without its equilibrium, because it has never been concentrated in meditative seclusion. But that’s where they give our impressions their true essence. This absence of it becomes apparent not only as something we recognize in others but also in ourselves when we act in a forced or aggressive manner without the feeling of the inner absolutely fundamental sense of calm and peacefulness that our true inner foundation fills us with.

Radien niejta and Sáivu niejta are ultimately the bridge to the preconscious content of life. To the spontaneous source of the emergence of raw unprocessed experience. In one and the same person, they awaken the natural world, the world as appearence and the world as it is, and inspire and personify our psychic content for us, and transform our lived life into psychic experiences, from which they give us our individualized sense of self and being, and connect us with the preconscious psychic foundation of our being, to whose source the human within us communicates this content, through its agents for the attainment of meditative insights, they do this by stirring up that which diminishes and idealizes our notions by conveying the boundless conceptualizations that give the true depth, meaning, and sense of a timeless belonging and context to our lives. She is the one who, when seen and lived through other things, causes our attention to seek her in the experiences we have had of what has been, by psychic reflection and self observation, or inspires us to seek her further by our experiences in what will be. In this way, this commotion on the stage of consciousness becomes how we constantly move back and forth in our being between what has been, and its possible tomorrows, and have a hard time to have a sense of the peaceful place where we find the origin and foundation of our being. Wherever we try to find ourselves in our life. Without this place within us, we cannot in an embodied way perceive the world as it is, with the inherent processes and laws that act on everything and govern us, independently and in themselves, as life in itself, or as Rádienáhkká in traditional terms, where we find the morality to which our entire preconscious life is subordinate and to which she, in a physical sense, makes us and our life experiences a part.

Meahcci, where nature psyche and culture become one and the same thing, generates realities from its own inner wholeness where its order and character involve the surrounding place
in its conditioned encounters, where the boundary between the underlying psychic stream of consciousness and its mediator is not always completely clear but fluid in relation to the material external order we usually expect. Meahcci does not always need sapmi for the psychic background of the preconscious whole to be stimulated and involved in a functional way in our lives. Although it is beneficial to stay there in seclusion for longer periods because of the meditative attention it creates. But it still occurs independently of us when the conditions are right, where the ego has a subordinate role and the underlying processes and actors are stimulated by the calm of an attentive but peaceful mind, and it can happen everywhere. If we ourselves seek the absolute stillness we have within ourselves, from which everything arises and which constitutes the true foundation of our inner being. This is not something separate from ourselves, but pure and uncorrupted experiential reality as we once perceived it and constantly return to, but with a mindful relationship to our senses as adults, which is something that has almost completely disappeared in today’s societies. Fortunately, the original communication with the spontaneous preconscious source of insight cannot disappear. We can ignore it and surpress it. Transferring it or confusing it with people or opinions without it being our own inner relationship to it. Which will make us feel miserable. But the connection cannot be broken. No matter how violently we ourselves or people around us try to ignore it and prevent our relationship to the content of the original sense of wholeness from being expressed, which is something that often happens just by us defending ourselves against being completely overwhelmed by the world as it is, and because it is a relationship we have within ourselves, by being threatened by our own resentment, our anxiety and our defenses as something we encounter in our relationship with the world that our senses convey to us. It is just a world based on sensation as opposed to a world of preconscious realities in personal transformation. How the world is in itself, independent of whether we are involved in the preconscious maturation process it is also part of or not. But the absolute simplest way to describe it is probably the constantly ongoing inner transformation that occurs in the relationship between intuition and our sensations and the relationship it implies between impressions and their experiential content in terms of generally accepted facts.

At first I didn’t know why it affected me so much. To become disillusioned. To feel like everything was getting to you, to have had enough. But when we ignore our psychic reflection, we replace it with faith and obsessive demands for uniformity. To relate to the crowd. Not meditatively to our individual part of the original whole. We see ourselves again in the ignorance that once made us feel inadequate and rejected. In meditative terms, it refers to the Indian psychological experience of nibbida, which alternates in presence with a circumference of a continuously expanding psychic space. At first in a feeling of infinite emptiness and loneliness. Of starting to see things as they are in a disillusioned sense. That everything is temporary. Impermanent and comes and goes all the time. That that emptiness also contains the unique relationship that consists of the spontaneous insight that emerges in the relationship between us and ourselves. But when we have experienced the infinite space within ourselves, nature as it is embodied through us, we also know that we do not need to see ourselves only through the ignorance that once hurt us and made us accept that we do not have access to our psychic space through all people. They must be allowed to meditate on their own terms. From the same early experience and unresolved insight into the vulnerability that arises within us, they cannot allow you to do it for them. Other reasons may be that the context is not compatible with the meaning of what our psychic reflection conveys to us. It is not yet sufficiently elaborated meditatively. We cannot force others to do so, nor can we be what they must be in themselves for them, independently of us, unless we just make them a version of something we want them to see of ourselves and not people in themselves, where we once again end up with disgust with worldly life, aversion, and indifference in nibbida. Oscillating back and forth between nibbida and the preconscious content of bhavanga. This in turn corresponds to the relationship in older Sami tradition between Saivo Niejta and Sáivu, or the preconscious psyche, where Saivo Niejta is the one who communicates the expositive relationship to the preconscious content of psychic life. Her other, or opposite side, is the formless image of a young woman who, like spring itself, inspires, beautifies everything and makes us connect with nature. Where everything has its own inner growing potential through her. But she also shows that everything is impermanent, temporary and fragile. Without her and her unconditionality, our sense of a union with Nature as a whole, its inner laws and morality is not possible. In this two-fold aspect she brings about the dynamics of the temporary life processes that governs all living things. But both the ancient Indian and the traditional Sami have in common that they both encounter the content of the preconscious psyche through their descriptions of the experiences we have of it in our lives. It is therefore through the psychic function that lies behind the impressions that gives us our perceptions that makes it possible to describe what we go through when we participate in our meditative life. By giving them both the recognition they deserve without preferring one over the other, or preferring someone else’s over them, we are giving recognition to a psychic preconscious content that we can only perceive experientially. Every description of them is a personal relationship to the experiences we make in our self-observation. So it does not matter how we judge others’ descriptions of how they view what they experience in relation to the preconscious content of the original whole. The pure experience still seems to be entirely personal and thus in constant transformation as it is stimulated by our way of life. If we choose to participate in it on conditions that emerges beyond us and during our psychic reflection as well as from the world as it is.

I have used eidetic forms deliberately when describing meditative experiences on a personal level, as it has become clear to me that sometime from about my first year of school and up to and including my early teens, a difference arises between our experiences of people around us, and the ways in which we have to relate to our emerging relation to our inner person and his contrasexual counterpart in the encounter we have with them within us. The incompatibility that arises between us in our relation to the eidetic forms and their supression by social conditioning, and between them and our inner parental pair, still anchors them as eidetic figures within us after we have separated them from people outside us. A kind of self-observation then emerges within us in relation to them where we begin to develop individual relationships to them that are independent of their previous external context. But if we are not provided with a functional individual outlet for our eidetic forms in relation to our meditative life, they remain in their primordial psychic relationship to us. From there they will influence us in a way that confuses them with people around us because just as we did as children we perceive everything we experience therein as one in the whole from which we later develop our psychically reflective relationships to them. Somewhere in our adolescence we have left the parental communication that previously carried the connection that created belonging and the contexts with it, which we have with its center which not only unites all opposites through the insights that follow from how it meets our experiences, but also guides us. This will then happen in direct relationship with them and not as before, mediated on a cultural basis through our inner parental pair seen through external people and dependent on an external context. What happens if we fail to establish a relationship with them is that we begin to relate to the structural content of our psyche and to our bodies as its vessels by intellectual means through ideas and concepts, instead of the genuine and direct experientially based relationships we have with others and ourselves on a meditative basis. Our inner sense of coherence and unity is instead intellectually spread out everywhere and our impressions and impulses seek all sorts of different ideas and opinions to calm our inner disorder, which in turn only further increases an already terrible confusion. Without us achieving any real contact with our own psychic and meditative reality to find the peace of mind that we create in a peaceful state of bodily calm as its vessel.

As our consciousness is confronted with the psychic flow of nonfigurative space, and it experiences itself in an infinite state of spatiality, all our personal needs for belonging and connection change their meaning. The transferred forms that mediate our individual communication with the psychic flow are also transformed as we, through meditative insight, slowly shift the source of our experiences from their personally conditioned transferred forms of eidetic images, to the nonfigurative impermanent flow that consciousness is stimulated by as it receives the information presented to it. We slowly transition to a purely experiential relationship to our existence in both a psychic and physically tangible sense. Our personal and eidetic world then becomes the imaginary reality that shaped our early relationships, and which, in contrast to the self-reflective meditative experiences we have, is what causes us to experience imbalance and a sense of constant insufficiency that comes from not being part of and ignore both our own and others original sense of the greater whole and its underlying way of communicating with and expanding our consciousness. Because if we have not experienced it ourselves, how can we acknowledge it in others, or as something inherent in life itself. Our reality becomes unreflective and in our immature relationship to the meditative states we use to relate to our world, we equate the perceptions we have of it with the psychic experiences we have of it. This ignorance is devastating both socially and culturally to the absolutely fundamental human condition we have within us. Without it, our sense of inadequacy will be a constant source of creating terrible human suffering without us even noticing it. It just becomes our accepted normal. We stage our own forms of eidetic relationships and act on them impulsively and without reflection, independently of others, as if it were a given that everyone else’s relationships to them within them were based on the same experiences. Which is of course impossible. For me, by spending time being in nature alone with myself, my psychic space is transferred onto the nature around me as a whole and it then merges into it. This then enables me in my meditative self-observation to see what is there, and what experiences I transfer to it from within my personal psychic sphere of eidetic forms and relationships. When this happens, a formless image of a young woman also appears. Like spring itself, she beautifies everything. Everything has its own inner growing potential through her. But she also shows that everything is impermanent, temporary and fragile. Without her and her awake unreservedness, the union with this greater whole and its inner laws is not possible. She brings about the dynamics and the temporary life processes that govern all living things. Together they constitute the inner balance that arises between the personally experienced and the experiences we share with everyone else through the eidetic forms they produce from our actions and impulses. This beautifying experience of nature itself, with its inner morality and harsh conditions, unites the personal and culturally conditioned perceptions we have of it with the whole.

Through psychic reflection and meditation we discover that consciousness contains eidetic forms that consist of both energy and information in the sense that when the mind is still, they expand consciousness through the insight that our meditative state creates of them. These eidetic forms are something that we will then progressively release from material and physical objects during our lives, which in turn has led us to separate them from their original psychic context and create the conscious content they were mixed with as the energy and information we see in their embodiment, but separate from the meditative significance they have for our psychic balance. For example, when our parents no longer need to carry the communication that is constantly there between us and the guiding principle that is at the center of our sense of a greater whole as an individual experience of that which unifies all opposites, becomes something of a relation to everything everywhere around us. This creates its own eidetic inherency and context. The balancing process they once conveyed is no longer something that we confuse with them. This applies to all our ideas and the concepts we create from this inherent content of energy and information. The earth and nature as a whole are also not something separate from us but are psychic events in which our bodies are created and united with by being made of the same material and bearing the same experiential origin. The meditative spatiality becomes part of the larger whole of conscious eidetic content with which they and all life are united. Through our meditative activity we discover that we share it with everything and everyone else as eidetic forms of psychic life. If I put this in context with ancient Indian experiential knowledge of psychic reflection, and in terms of their use of meditation, something that we often immaturely regard as absent-mindedness, but which through meditation has developed over many individual lifetimes to be understood as an active participation in the processes and undercurrents that are going on in the ever-present underlying psychic substructure we are a part of and allow ourselves to be supported by through the knowledge of the meditation techniques that they have developed and learned to apply to what we call psychic reflection. When our mind has calmed down and settled into the orphaned emptiness that arises within it, the feeling and content of the experiences that spontaneously arise in our consciousness, and partake in the spaciousness whose totality goes beyond it, and whose outbreak accompanies certain mental states and processes as representatives of an indispensable individual process, which leads us to the cause and condition of the conscious activity and to an expansion of the scope of our consciousness from its present state. In terms of the experiences made over centuries in and around India, these underlying processes to which we are constantly and unconsciously subjected whether we like it or not, have been known for a very long time to those meditators who, by focusing their attention on the kasinas, have trained themselves mentally in the various states of jhana. In cultivating the energy inherent in the information of the elevated states created by nimitta, the causal element in phenomena and the eidetic forms that emerge when the psychic undercurrents of bhavanga meet external stimuli, this is the psychic substructure that is reflected in each individual consciousness as its present state and inner activity, in the tranquility of the meditative one-pointedness of ekaggata, but also as a unification of the mind, and in how it position itself in relation to the original sense of the primordial whole, or nibbana.

We all have it in us. Especially when we are young, but many ”adults” are completely unaware of it as well. We entrust our bad conscience to others, to escape it and to be able to continue to be guided without restrictions by our impulses, and let others alleviate it for us by carrying some of it. In this way, we believe like children that we are free from the responsibility of our guilt and that we can avoid making the sacrifices of our spontaneity that we sometimes have to make for reasons that are sometimes moral, and others that are about not pretending that we can negotiate away our conscience through others for them to carry what we do not want to carry ourselves of the impulses and impressions that question them. We have all done it and then sometimes prefer to instead emphasize our innocence and live in naive freedom of responsibility through our still childishly undeveloped impulsiveness, in contrast to the self-observing spontaneity of the more adult personality that is carried and expressed without a guilty conscience by the individual person himself in relation to others. It is our remorse, the ugly side of our conscience that we try to negotiate away in order to live in innocent faith, free from suffering, and imagine that we are all good and, like children, incapable of doing others a disservice and harming them. By rationalizing away our psychological self-reflection. But as long as we maintain this fear, nothing changes. We and our closest “conscience friends” continue in childish ignorance to do as we have always done and learned to treat others. Without understanding why we experience anxiety or feel bad about ourselves. I mean this to be recognized in the sense of an awakening, but not something to be confused with a feeling of inadequacy that arises when we try to go beyond the experiential limits of our personality, but as an inner liberation from a conditioned relationship to a convenient sense of a naive psychic reality.

While in psychic reflection and our attention shifts outward as if we are looking at ourselves from the outside and from an immobile mass of mental states constantly present over time, we experience expansive sensations successively filling out all of its space, an unlimited spaciousness we occupy as it includes our own consciousness in a sense of a greater unification with nature, and with consciousness as its infinate space of matter where we are making realities out of concepts. Concepts like the different conditions of the ajna and sahasrara center’s in the jhana’s, and its focuses on specific meditation subjects as the cultivating of the meditative experiences of their emanating psychic energies in our self observation. Of the meditative states of both rupa-jhana and arupa-jhana absorptions, which serve us as a basis for accessing deeper forms of knowledge in the state of consciousness that arises from the intervals of thought and cognition during meditation. Our relation to the experience of our psyche opens up its connection to the nature and the earth in its sense of a wholness which center have a communication with our inner person as it appears to us in its unification of all opposites, and of the obtainment of direct experiental knowledge.

We all make experiences through mental reflection. By meditating on them and trying to come to terms with our psychic life. And trying to find some kind of agreement that provides a balance between the different parts that operate both within and outside of us through others. In one way the psychic experiences in themselves, in another over how we or others try to describe and relate to them. But in themselves, what we experience still originally comes from the same psychic source. Regardless of our opinions or how we want to look at them. What then becomes obvious is that when we are still children, it is others who teach us and condition how we should relate to these experiences. How we should describe them and how we should act based on their impact on us. If we do not allow ourselves the psychic reflection that comes with the inner maturity that our self-observation creates in relation to them, we will continue to let others describe how we should formulate and process our own experiences. They then do not become personal based on the fact that it is we who have tried to come to terms with them and meditatively reflect on their relationship to us in our lives. We have just continued to leave it to others to condition this for us. From a meditative point of view, we are still children in relation to our psychic life, and our immature nescience and ignorance anaesthetize our mind and makes us inaccessible to the meditative space where we communicate with our self-perceived and observable psychic experiences of the reality it is to be human. Strangely enough, it is most often those who fiercley deny and try to undermine or destroy this within us that make most of us choose to let them lead us.