my relation to inspiration

One aspect of ordinariness is its paternal “thinking”. And what it once decided to, was the way we should relate to our own mind, and where to find its source of origin. How we should act to acquire it. We have learned through paternal ordinariness how we should relate to the primal root of abstract inspiration. That it is ordinariness that should provide us with it. We should get it from there if we want to get acceptance. Not from any actual experiences of our senses in relation to individual life and its place outside of time, common to all of us with its unique expression in every individual. Even if you have a vague feeling of not being authentic, or true to yourself, your experiences and others. Ordinariness have this paternal way of deciding how you should go about relating to your mind, and mold your inspiration according to what is “accepted” through ordinariness. But what if my source of origin is a shared source, related to a creative property of something experienced from both within, and outside of individuality. A relation to this kind of primal source of origin often makes it difficult to align it with the “ordinariness” of what accepted “thinking” should be, or be related to. But I would embarrass myself if i didn’t listen to it. As I would try to be something that I am not, and dispise myself for doing it. Because this alignement is crucial to all my relations. We can have no common relation to being without it.
I think this ordinariness no longer have a relation to this origin and its source of spontaneus information.
It has only one source. The maternal “womb” of usualness.