I am a multicausal process with many intentional origins

I no longer have any hope. Its gone. It just isn’t there anymore. I see no conceivable continuation to the better of how we act on this world from its present state. I see myself in it, but not the world in that content. My experiences do not connect to its present state of mind. The part of me that has to do with it has lost the old transference from which it was made. The civilized part of me that was created for me have no connection to the nature that transforms it. To the Nature I come from and who involves me in my existence. What we call culture has no meaning for me because it does not embody anything in me, in my nature. To try to emulate it, to be “civilized”, is to deny how it behaves spontaneously, and the directions it conveys to me. I think that as long as we deny our nature, there is nothing civilized in what we call culture. Because humans are not the only acting subjects in our environment. I experience an active interplay, or a coupling between the perceiving subjective experiencing, together with that which it perceives. It makes perception participatory for me, since places also gather experiences and histories. By doing so, they do themselves become social beings and actors. We mutually co-create each others’s sense of being with them as well as with all non-human minds that is part of the psychical nature we are embedded in, and the knowledge it is producing. It is more real to me to say that we live as objects in an inter-subjectivity than anything else, in a direct subject-to-subject sharing of presence. But most of us has lost, denies, or never had any language to be able to participate in it. And without it, there is only a surface left of how we are formulated by our culture, by its empty political correctness. There is no hope in that, and we will perish by it. This means that when we do, we will have nowhere else to go than to our Nature. But we never get there if we cannot acknowledge that the world is at least partly evil, and that that evil is there because we are also part of it through ourselves. In how our civilised social attitude denies the validity of others in their relation to their own nature as formulated by them. Which compulsively will make others an image of ourselves, not letting their subjective presence count. In this we tend to make the whole of mankind an opposite of its parts.