Piety is not humility

The whole of my life’s encounter with Christianity has always been to a strange form of dualism with piety. It’s like its there as a remain from an earlier christian mindset. From my earliest childhood the public world has unknowingly tried to use that to eradicate the being part of the human in me. The part that will challenge stereotyping. Even today I still recognize it in the collective behaviors of people and officials I encounter. And it is still used as a means of control with its unrealistic undercurrent of christian piety.
It is believed that everyone must follow its regulations because piety is used as a form of passive aggression to any challenge of its content. You have to pay attention and be aware of the morals of its subliminal life, and submit to its pressure of conformity, or you are to be excluded from social life because otherwise you are going to expose people to what they are outside of that piousness. This is something most people don´t really want to know about at all.
To be conditioned by this piety is to be separated from your senses and the reality of your experiences. You will be partly anesthetized. No matter what is actually done to you in the acts of this distorted goodness. You have to conform to an impossible idealism and become what they want you to be to them.
That is why I have always been kind of unsettling to people around me. I am not a mechanical piece in the architecture of official morality. That is a pious morality so abominable that it way surpasses all biblical horrors in the real world.
But still, people really think they are only good because they are pious people. No matter the drama they continuously must create to uphold collective morality in their pious life.

The alchemy of my senses

I think we are all part of these vibratory patterns of physical energy, where causality in a sense turn our essence into notes in a wave of music that requires time to exist. We are vibrating notes in an unconscious symphony where both living things, and places in our world share a relation to two different states of being with everything else. Our experience of this causality can switch its behavior within the same objective phenomenon of matter from where it originates into energy, and at the same time, act in different places, and in completely different individual structures of space.
This is casuality experienced as an ongoing creation personally manifesting itself as imagination and form.

About leaders and followers

We know that there is something wrong with the world when we learn by a process of indoctrination, and not by having elders as teachers and leaders that are the best living examples of what the end result of our education and life experience should be. No human, in any human society, can really flower until they understand what individual components their human personality contains in a context to its society.
Right now it is more than evident that we try to accomplish this with a shattered experience of what we are, and without any unifying experience that can guide us in our psychic life.
We train professionals but not human beings. And we learn by indoctrination something that is quite different and apart from the reality of how we experience our life.
Ethics flow from the members of the ongoing life of a society, and as such is indistinguishable from its customs. It is from memorising this, we introject and copy our behaviour.

My participation in the theory of evolution as life

There is this one continuous uninterrupted stream of life from the point of view of both my psyche and my biology, when I am looking at it in a linear fashion and involving the creation of all life on earth. I habitually associate this with the idea of evolution. But the thing is, I am related to every part of its life, and to all of its various forms of biological patterns and structures. It is what I’m composed of. I am not something differentiated from this as the term species suggests.
I am both an evolutionary component of nature and an inherent psychological potential of it.

One example of my biological relation to evolution is put forward by professor Jordan Peterson, of the University of Toronto. Like humans, lobsters exist in hierarchies and have a nervous system attuned to status which “runs on serotonin”. The higher up a hierarchy a lobster climbs, this brain mechanism helps make more serotonin available. The more defeat it suffers, the more restricted the serotonin supply.
According to Peterson, hierarchies in humans work in a similar way – we are wired to live in them.

It is quite likely that biology in this sense is available to all life as universal structures and biological patterns inherent in the evolution of the physical world. And that we share common characteristics with many different parts of life. In this case as Peterson points out, we have a relation to lobsters.
Another simple example is that with our lungs we share breath with the photosynthesis of trees. And of course, the idea of evolution itself as an aspect of the world within because it is originating from that immaterial substance we call psyche in the first place. Which somehow has the ability to create itself out of matter. Here it is formed as a concept of evolution from its continuous and uninterrupted stream of imagination that we are part of as our common experience of culture and our collective mind. This is not something that has to be specific to just one species.

about the word globalization

Globalization is the word we use with companies and banks for them to be able to utilize all available local resources everywhere at no cost. To maximize their profits where they are not responsible for anyone, or anything, anywhere in the world.
It is really the ultimate disconnection from the earth.

Transforming masculinity

This image is one of those images that in this precise moment immediately made sense to me. I just look at it and there it is. A perfect image of that nonverbal something that is going on, and you cannot really put your finger on what it is. Its meaning just hits you. And at the same time, it brings back many years of working in the presence of modern art in my head, and I realise just how far off the collective mind is from its metaphysical source. There is this great expression of confusion and turmoil searching for meaning in modern art.  But in this image, there is no confusion, it is the ascending essence of male potentiality turning itself into a psychic substance by leaving matter. What a great find!

a substantial fragment of the old

At a certain point in life we become exposed to the experience of a multigenerational being extended far beyond our distant ancestors. We suddenly appear somewhere in the process of life where we are receiving vital information from a new source, one that builds upon another kind of knowledge and on the parameters and possibilities that our personality contained up to this point in time. That part of us experiencing this change is also that part of us that has been unchanged by time. And we have learned not to pay too much attention to it for such a long time that most people are now perceiving it almost in its original or pristine state. Leaving them in a dualistic condition. This eternal part have existed there before the life of any individuality begun, and continues to exist when the life of the individual ends. But as we are in a transformation of beliefs based on the vision we have, and in an experience of assimilating our psychic reality, forging a new formation of that essence together with the presence of the older forms of our nature. This new and nonverbal sense of being will respond to our life and to other people with a world of its own. 

We are all part schamans or holy men

In a sense we all function as schamans. With our more or less involontary manifestations of inferred processes of meanings, moulding our empirical life, we do not proceed into action only from physical facts. Our psyche is what describes how our experiences is going to appear to us. And these processes emanate from an ever present primordial source with its own native tongue, as an ancestral part of our being that goes on weather we acknowledge it or not. They are not a product of our conscious intention. They are more kind of semi-autonomous. We do not invent them, we experience them. So being what we are, expressing these self-revelations of a universal and timeless structure from this preconscious psychic world, we are all schamans with a creative relationship to it, forging our link to the fabrics of life. We are becoming its statements trying to formulate itself to us in imaginative expressions outside of time, and beyond ego centric individuality. This is the substance given to physical life. The original revelations of what is present, and thought of as the purpose behind all social life.

about time and substance

When we are unable to discover our being as part of an individual experience of universal time, and how to live under an aspect of the sacrosanct experience as a reference for us to become humans, we live with what is present but not part of our conscious intention. Our ancestral part of the mind and its empirical world really is a life of its own, with demands of its own psychic assumptions.
Creation here is a kind of instant recognition. Something that is going on both inside us, and all around us at the same time. Its an ongoing process. Not some reprocessed moral dogma derived from certain political or religious historical references in relation to authoritarian ”fathers”.
We define ourselves in respect to how we can make our experiences applicable to the world. And if this is what all universe share as a structure in which all creation participate, is it not just logical to also assume that all creation have the ability to simultaneously relate to every other part of creation to which it also participates?
Which is to say, When a certain recognition is not made part of our conscious attitude, it will reappear to us objectively like something out of fate.
That fate will then demonstrate itself in outbursts of protests to a lack of acceptable leadership, political turmoil, climate change, pollution, dehumanisation, devaluation of psychological processes and religious traditions.
It really gives one a sense of humanity being on a visible path to the destruction of our world. Its almost like the view we have of our world and its present state is about to come to an end.
However important that psychological collective brakedown is, the most important part of this is that it also gives us a hint towards that which really have to change.

The original flow of ethics

If you take the manifestation of a personal experience from its local and individual context and make it a truth applicable to all time and places, you have what politics and religious psychology have of trying to imprint experiences on people and cultures where it doesn’t make any sense.
This is feudalism of thought.
Instead of relying on the purity of expression as revelations within a living structure of recognitions, of relationships from people and their immediate environment, we endlessly repeat some historical significant dictates of past experiences with no connection to the present. And we try to permanent them. But universal time is something to be interpreted as a continuous communication with insights of additional knowledge about the nature of the world. And our ethics flow from that.
It does not flow from trying to permanent historical ideas or events.
The secularisation of any society is always this. The secular doctrine of permanency.

from the perspective of the most primordial

I am only a passage of generations in the shape of the human mind through the experience of the initial paternal principle of form and energy associated with mythology and the cultural products of man.
I am not an idea, or the conceptual and symbolic reality it creates. I am nature, matter and earth.
I am a son by a specific father’s complex, a fabric of the personal unconscious of natural occurrences in every human being. But I am also part of man’s mythology. And the ancestral source that generated me.
That’s what the experience of personal reality does, it exercises the role of fertilizing the primordial forces that impregnate us.

Teachings and reality

I have always sensed that knowledge somehow has departed from experience. And that the vehicle to get in touch with the reality of our existence was lost somewhere along the way in our education. What we experience, somewhere came to a point where it no longer had any representation in what we where taught to think. And the cultural tradition that was suppose to support me with a vehicle for this communion became dormant in my being. But the connection to it did not. People having this connection, cannot get it revitalized out of any academic training to memorize things. We get energized by places and by people. Our individual reality exists in the nature of the immediate. And we experience these patterns of relationships outside the rational habit of diminish almost everything that comes from the impulses that originally generated them.
It is traditional teaching or what we call analytical psychology that will provide us with the reintroduction of our being into this process.
How can anyone ever learn to become human if they never get any teachings about what the reality of our experiences are?

About time and balance

Time is the geometrical concept we use to describe distance, and we habitually apply it to the voluminous content of consciousness. Here it restrict us to our immediate physical environment. And thus, space becomes consciousness.
Outside the concept of time, in absolute time, or universal time, time will lack its physical form and geometrical value of distance. Consequently, everything becomes related to everything else. Everything will exist, influence, and interact with everything else at the same time. Time on the other hand, will always depend on having an individual, or tangible form.
The relations we will have of our experience then, is like being in two different states of the same psychic phenomenon. But each in an individual or different time, manifest either as some sort of matter, or some kind of substance. But most likely as patterns of energy.
By relating only to time, we make ourselves solemnly dependent on distance, not on the actual origin of the experience itself.
Life can optionally be thought of as an ongoing balance between these two states.
We may think that ideas, dogmas or doctrines, are physical realities. Like objects, or ”things”. And that energy, or impulses is something immaterial that lack physical attributes.
The truth is, we experience everything simultaneously. We are that reality. Ask any physicist.
Or someone in love.

What history is made of

History is the rational concept we use, to be able to put ourselves in ideas and events at the expense of experience, and to describe the actions of people dressed in an intellectually fixed reality, externalised in the substitute personality of a collective.
That is why history in the western and christian sense, may better be described from an individual and human perspective, outside of conceptual history, as a personally experienced horror of reoccuring psychopathic patriarchs, completely absorbed by the ruling principle of power. Something that is more than obvious in the grandiose imagination of globalisation and in the history of economic empires.

about the cyclical economy

If our banks create access to money in a way that drives investors and entrepreneurs, and if this money is simultaneously invested outside the real demand in a market economy, then an economy has been created which is due to an artificial demand and to artificial price increases as a result of where this money is first put into the economy.
We thus get economic cycles that do not always depend on, or reflect, where the market economy pricing and demand are of their own power.
Instead, it will reflect where the banks think they can best serve their interests.
When reality then catches up with these bloated economic conditions, we get a recession with less money in circulation, but with the debt remaining that is the cost of the money that was created and driven the artificial economic upturn in the economy.
In this way, companies and individuals pay jointly for the banks’ speculation.

Banks should work with asset management and lend money. But why do they get to create money in that process?

About reality and experience

Reality in the sense of ideas or perceptions is what you allow your mind to accept, not what you actually experience.

This can make us completely oblivious of an external reality, of what is really going on in the world from the perspective of individual experience. That which make us have an emotional and moral reaction that correspond to what our senses actually mediates to us.
Just look at the news, all the horrors they convey, from personal tragedies to state conflicts, to the destruction of our living conditions here on earth for profit.
It is what we do.
And it is not just a problem with leadership today, it is about us.
What we allow our mind to accept at the expense of our experiences.

I think I do pray a lot

Prayer in a modern sense is to wait for an idea, or something to be realized that is not the result of pure reasoning. We are looking for an answer that is beyond that.
So, what we are trying to do is to put our ego’s at rest for a moment, and create a connection to a source that is not directly available to the ego.
By definition I think this will qualify as praying, whether my ego wants to admit to it or not.
That is to say that we don’t pray to history, or to a past. It is something we do all the time.
Its really a kind of mystery. But we all do it.
It is our base of reflexion.

About the nature of things

There is this substance of matter. Or essence if you like, that is placed inside the physical or material world of objective experience. It is what we call the nature of ”things”. The world from within. We find it everywhere. In people, places, plants and animals. And yet, somehow we seem to have forgotten that we take part in it not only through scientific reasoning, but also directly with our senses. We get access to it as experience filtered through our background and in the psychological layers of our ancestral past.
There is an obvious difference in our approach to reality between them, but they are of equal validity.
From a human perspective though, from the reality of personal experience, and from how we experience things in our world, it is really disorienting for anyone not being able to access our nature in a living psychological context that gives substance to matter.
What this will do to us is to create a suffering that is really quite maddening because there is no medical illness that we can attach to an experience like that. We have become unable to relate our personal experience to a living world. And we have no frame of mind that we can put it in. There is no cure to this by diagnosis, by some pills, or some self treatment with alcohol. It can only be treated by individual experience. And by the expulsion of the conceptual reality of the collective mind.
This absence of relations is something we get from the experience of the world as a symptom.

the philosophical approach

When it comes to the subject of the world as a phenomenon of spiritual experience, or the living source of beingness, one cannot expect not to find that C G Jung has already been there in his research.
This is what he have to say about the spirit (link to excerpt).

”Once we have freed ourselves from the prejudice that we have to refer to concepts of external experience or to a priori categories of reason, we can turn our attention and curiosity wholly to that strange and unknown thing we call spirit.”

His wording is that of a philosopher, but how spot on wasn’t that.

This is what i think every son has to find out for himself, if he is ever to get a sense of any independence from what every father has left behind in him to solve.
Because as an individual in his own right, his relation to the world will absolutely depend on it.

The spirit of nature and the mind of materialism

I like to clarify what I meant previously by the creation of a materialistic, or intellectually fixed reality? Or the concept of reality as an object. A thing.
Take totemism. The kin relationship between people, plants and animals.
The concept of totemism does not explain anything. It just makes human experience an object. And as an object it does not connect to anything. Thats materialistic. There is no living connection to experience.
But if you say that certain plants and people have a kinship because they will heal you, and others are antagonistic and will kill you. You have a kinship with the spirit of that plant that is good for you. The same goes with animals. Certain animals go well together, some with people and others don’t. People have a close relation to some animals and not with others. Thats a kinship. What follows is that with kinship there is a responsibility. You have a relationship of respect to fulfill. And this relation calls for it. If you violate this relationship, it will be the destruction of the life of that experience, and ultimately it will also become the destruction to all kinship relations on which we are dependent.
This is not about ideologies or certain beliefs systems. Its about human experience and a moral obligation to our environment.

About our essence

I think it is because most people right now doesn’t have an objective experience of the essence of our being, and an experience of it as a continuous revelation in communion to nature in both places and people, instead of in history and its events, that causes them to have this compulsive need to always philosophically try to explain everything. To search for external explanations.
And by trying to create a materialistic, or intellectually fixed reality, placing our spirit in concepts and ideas, we really miss out on having an ongoing living sense of reality based on experience in terms of our relationship to life.
In this context, belief is not something that is available to me as a replacement for experience.
And by looking at the world, it does not seem to be working there either.

What is a zombie?

Definition of a zombie.

A person who infects everyone with his or hers addictive need to feed on other peoples flesh for the purpose of trying to materialize its dead soul and bring it back from its deathlike slumber.

Pretty much an image of the spirit of a modern man.

On the spirit of gender conversations

When i was listening to this discussion about differences in gender aggression it suddenly dawned on me what i was really listening to.
It was really not the subject at hand, or the statements made, it was the spirit of their arguments. How they confronted each other. It suddenly made sense to me what was happening.
Mr Peterson was not trying to relate any of his arguments to her. Or create a common ground of mutual interest between them. He was trying to make his point, no matter what. His arguments where non-relational and affected. They came out almost as he was being possessed. And if psychic connectivity is a feminine trait, it was clearly absent. It was not inspired as in a relation to her. To the external situation. There was no kindness or warmth in this discussion trying to bridge a connection by subject on to the other part. It was conditioned and he was opinionated and affected, and he was trying to force his arguments through without really relating them to her.
On the other hand she was trying to diminish his arguments and ridicule individual statements. She was not trying to process any of his arguments based on their own value, making this a discussion about the subject at hand. She was not into the spirit of the conversation. And if objective interest is a masculine trait, her masculinity was destroying her ability to relate with her masculinity to the arguments presented to her. She obviously sensed that she was pushed because the arguments was not aimed for her, but forced onto her. So she then appeared equally possessed, but by her masculinity, making them both have a go at each other with a kind of automatic and confrontational behaviour.
So, if it has ever been masculine traits in women, and female traits in men, this is how I imagine they would appear when they are compulsive. Animating men and creating animosity for women.
I just had to look at the spirit of a conversation to be able to see it.

Have a look.

On the spirit of masculinity

I would like to add to what Mr Jordan Peterson talks about in this clip. And it is that the individual experience and phenomenology of the masculine spirit, when it is being cultivated inside psychological relations, or the feminine, it will immediately become challenged by the dark side of civilization, which it cannot neglect any more. This will in turn lead to a sense of a deep moral responsibility towards acknowledging were it is leading us in terms of being human. It is the loss of that which makes people go mad and the spirit of masculinity go so wrong. This reality is not beyond human understanding. It is just perceived in another way than externalized rational thinking. But he makes a very good point when he speaks about what the outcome is of the devaluation of spirit, or objective interest. When it is externalized, and not part of our objective psychic functioning in both men and women. People will become disoriented and confuse moral responsibility with literal judgements.
In that society people will become dogmatic, inhuman and materialistic. They will loose their ability to connect individual experiences to human life. No matter how brutal, or hostile to life itself those human conditions are, or what has become of that society.

about being uncivilized

From our civilized point of view, we must shame ourselves out, act foolishly and be mischievous, if we are to become humans, but without thinking that this is what we are.
Because it is not.
There is an objective from within that comes as a reaction to the conditions which we are situated in. And by letting oneself have a go with it, we are trying to behold our internal oracles as its source. In this case it is a socially completely uncivilized psychic character, it is our suppressed native, and original being. The part of us that is in denial and the world will suffer.
He will tell us all about the excessive conventionality and rationalism we are exposed to, or use on ourselves to cage our minds with. The more sofisticated or civilized we are, the darker he will be. He will show us all kinds of sad and horrible things that will come out of it when we are not paying attention, or identify ourself with him. From poverty to beggars, alcohol and drug addiction. To inequality, idealism and all kinds of impulsiveness, abuse and pertinacious extremism. We make him compulsive.
In one sense he is our true reaction to an invasive world. The ancestral force of subversion to the current state of affairs in a group or collective. To what we have become subjected to, and to what we have to deal with inside the world.
But if we take his reaction literally, and not as an objective event. Or he is viewed upon as something personal. An individual aberration that needs treatment, something we need to abolish. We are going to start to treat other people and ourselves accordingly.
Our reaction to his influence is how far from being we have come with civilization.
We have taken almost all humanity out of it. In fact, we have become so ”civilized”, that we don’t even really question the conditions by which this so called civilazation works on the perception of its individuals when it comes to just being human.

About being a ”civilized” being

There is always going to be an opposition in us between our ”civilized”, rationalized academic way of life, and our ”indigenous” or uncivilized anti-intellectual way, where our nature, when not given proper attention, will turn us into dumb compulsive and irrational beings. Not really relating our psychic experiences to life and to other people. Because when we surpress that life, as we have done for such a long time by desecrating it in our collective life, and in favour of civilization. We have created a completely conceptual religious and materialistic reality which have not only distanced us from our selves, from our nature and moral responsibility, but it has also distanced us from our experience of immediate knowing and the validity of paradoxical thinking. Booth of which are just opposite parts of any personal make up.
From our ”indigenous” side we can experience the immediate knowing of the oracular, revelatory and ancestral resources of the mind that are shut off from us by conditioning and upbringing.
But we defend against it with our conventionality.

about the origins of being

When I trace my ancestry I can follow my linage all the way back to the psychic origins of our first and original ancestors, and the true source of my being.
By finding my way to them, I do not invent their originality, I experience them.
They are behind the mentality of all my statements about psychic happenings and world events.
In a sense, they stand outside of history because they provide me with a creative relation to our timeless being. They are the involuntary psychic heritage and inferred meaning behind a world of their making. Their doings is the template from which all life emerges. They are always there and I am the product of their intentions.

The creative present of the future

As the life of the psyche arises out of organic life. It has the unique quality of creating itself through its own activity. It is from within this womb of mother nature itself that all the world events are born.
And it depends on us whether we help coming events to birth and give shape to all life, or whether we turn it into poison.

about being exposed to nothingness

If I cannot relate the themes of my psychological processes to actual situations and to other people. Their behaviour will make me feel confused and desoriented. Its like trying to relate to something that doesnt exist. They will really make me feel that none existent and empty.
Its like being exposed to a grave.

About faith

Even if we are coming from a learned or forced devaluation and neglection of our being, we no longer need faith to believe in the impulses, sufferings and anguish we experience from the psyche. Nor do we need any endorsement to believe in any of the material that claim our attention from within. We will still carry it with us everyday as our common source of pychological reality as we do it with any kind of objective experience. Behind it we will even find our modern way of initiation. And we don’t need to believe in neurological pathways to be able to have it. It’s a symbolic reality. And the material offered to us is still going to affect us wheather we choose to acknowledge it as our reality or not.
It is what we are.

About being from Norrbotten

Being born in Norrbotten, Sweden is to be born with a certain kind of proudness. You are proud in a certain sense of being. But not like the citified people from the southern part of Sweden have it.
That is not proudness.
This is about a collective memory of a relation to oneself. And what we are surrounded with by birth. Its about having a relation to appearance by how it connects to our beingness.
We are aware of this relation because we are born with it.
Our being has made us constantly aware of this relation between what people are, and what they appear to be. And it is what sets us apart from people down south.
This is also what generates our kind of stubbornness. Often experienced as distrust by outsiders. But what it really is, is proudness. Everything depends on being relatable by being.
We dont like to give in to appearence.

Psyche materialized

There is a big difference for mankind in acting on the psychological material of the world, and participate in the balancing of the natural forces of our nature on a metaphysical plane. Since once it has materialized in the physical world, it is already to late.

Before this, we came from somewhere

As we move further into life, we have to leave what has up to a certain point been our introjected frame of mind. We have realised that to preserve the integrity of our self, we now have to bring ourself back from where we have been in parts, and misplaced. We have to return to the origins of what we are.
So we move on and we discover that we have been born into our parents and grandparents ancestral psychological settings. And as we continue on, we learn about the mindset and memory of the society wherein that has been embedded. But as we are living in those settings, we also have to find our own individual relation to them. How we belong to it all. We really have to find out how this is going to make sense for us. How the source of what we are and the primordial themes of our psychic life can become one again. We will have to connect to our metaphysical ancestors.
The forces facing us as we move closer to them is far beyond what rationality alone can comprehend. And when we as beings in the world turn our impulses inside out, we will become consumed by them. And when engulfed, we try to hold on to something. Anything that can save us from them. And we do that by grouping around a conceptual reality, a political ideology, or whatever we may come across rationally for the purpose of not having to become exposed to the violent forces that threatens us from our within.
The powers we meet here are as irrefutable as they are real.
And we really have to realise what we call wisdom and kindness, has to come from somewhere.

ancestral states of reality

A while ago i stumbled over an excerpt that beautifully described an experience i had that triggered a series of events that completely changed how i perceived everything around me at that time in my life.
I completely broke from the life i had then, and went into an uncharted country. The rational world that up to that point had dominated me, turned into its neglected counterpart.
In short, i came to my senses and its instinctual and cyclical connection with nature.
The excerpt that now perfectly described what then happened to me came from Carl Gustav Jung. It hit me like a combined image of processes, feelings and thoughts. Here it is:
In so far as the spirit is also a kind of ”window on eternity”… it conveys to the soul a certain influx divinus… and the knowledge of a higher system of the world, wherein consists precisely its supposed animation of the soul.
Or to put it another way, the energy of my objective interest turned inward, to my senses and that awakened my inner, or psychic relatedness to both myself and to my world. My whole world became both rational and relational. I became aware of myself in a sense of being part of nature inside this past, that went far beyond myself as a single lifetime. And that this somehow, from now on, just had to be integrated into my life.
So by this quote I suddenly realised exactly what had happened to me. What had happened inside of me. Here it was formulated to me in another way, and before this happened to me, such things would have been impenetrable. Now, it was somewhat surprising to me, because Jung is an unbelievably thorough thinker and i can just about think myself out of a paper cup. But the underlying processes that he described confirmed what had happened to me, and made an absolutely clear image of what i went through at that time. I could never had come even close to be able think about my senses like that.
Anyways, at that moment i learned that as he was absolutely true to his experience, and that he was trying to mediate it as being a thinker of our being. And if one is really true to the flow of life as it passes through us, it will always be understandable if we negotiate it from within ourselves.
Our ability to understand what we are is not dependent on how we navigate. It is dependent on how true we are to the origin of our self when we move from our subjective state to an objective reality. That is also why I have always felt uneasy or uncomfortable with people who are repeatedly moving from one objective form of reality to the next. Because the only thing there, is just this formalised collective personality.
There is no self, no individual relationship to being.
Or once again:
So long as the self is unconscious, it corresponds to Freud’s super-ego and is a source of perpetual moral conflict. If, however, it is withdrawn from projection and is no longer identical with public opinion, then one is truly one’s own yea and nay. The self then functions as a union of opposites and thus constitutes the most immediate experience of the Divine which it is psychologically possible to imagine.
I would not use the word divine myself, but it really says something about the true force of nature that we are exposed to from the inside of our ancestral world.

All my relations

My encounters with people depends on an inner connection. I am intimate first of all with myself. To be touched by you i need to be touched within. I listens to the effect of others within. If i am not connected within myself, or if each one within him or herself are not connected, there is not going to be any connection. My self will lack direction to being and to any kind of human intimacy. We will just experience absence, repression, distance and judgemental superficial separation of arguments into opposing extremes. Everything is going to be turned into rational arguments of moral opposites like good or bad. Or maybe clinical ones like what is ill and well. But mostly logical as in true and false mixed up with good and bad to become an infinite loop of arguments leading nowhere on what to accept or not.
There’s not going to be a real connection for me to any real personal experience since intimacy to its largest part has an intuitive dimension beyond the physical one of love and sexuality.
And if this is not just me, then there must be something wrong with most people in this world.
Just watch and listen.
Our normal is really not a good thing.

On masculinity

If one equates masculinity with objective interest, or make an analogy with it like with the wind. But of an internal kind, blowing around inside, and one is undifferentiated from it.
Like a child the ego is going to try to ride this wind, and we are going to be thrown around on it behaving like we were crazy without being able to stop. On this ride there is no real reflection, no inner context in relation to judgement, and no real connection to earth. Or to being. We just continue to behave like restless children trying to control the movements of this energy, or make it behave in certain ways.
At some point in life we have to learn to let it go, we have to release it because we understand that it has its own way and its own direction. We learn the hard way that our erratic behaviour comes from us trying to capture it. But since this is an impossible task and it will completely wear us out, we instead starts to listen to it trying to understand what it have to say. We even try to find out where it wants to go in itself.
And suddenly to this great and total confusion to us, it turns inward, and to earth. It moves there to create this relation to where it is all about relations. And this move comes with its own inherent morals. It is like an initial date that is suddenly turned into a relation, like a marriage. A union between that energy and to a kind of true relatedness. Its like we suddenly become physical beings in a metaphysical world.
And the world one has left behind becomes this one sided world of truly insane conceptual opposites.
A world that is really horrible to ever have been any part of.
Herein lies the very reason to the compulsiveness in my change.

What about climate change 2

More than 10 000 species go extinct each year. They are lost forever from life itself and will never appear again. This is something that happens on a daily basis almost entirely because of habitat loss and soil destruction as a result of our emissions of greenhouse gases, and from our exploitation of earth in terms of deforesting, farming, global urban expansion, mining, oil drilling, water pollution, oil sand extraction, etc.
Because all species live and interact with an ecosystem, that system will also suffer with more of its species lost when we change that system.
The dynamics of all life cycles comes from earth’s cover with soil, as thin as only one-two meters. This thin layer of soil is the foundation of all life. Every ecosystem dynamically interacts with it, and has a total reliability on its ability to host and maintain the constant regeneration of new life.
Life as we know it are completely dependent on it.
We can then discuss our impact, and our losses all we want.
This is where the change now occur. Those plants and animals are not coming back.
We are at a point in time where we are actually disrupting earths ability to create life.