A while ago i stumbled over an excerpt that beautifully described an experience i had that triggered a series of events that completely changed how i perceived everything around me at that time in my life.
I completely broke from the life i had then, and went into an uncharted country. The rational world that up to that point had dominated me, turned into its neglected counterpart.
In short, i came to my senses and its instinctual and cyclical connection with nature.
The excerpt that now perfectly described what then happened to me came from Carl Gustav Jung. It hit me like a combined image of processes, feelings and thoughts. Here it is:
“In so far as the spirit is also a kind of “window on eternity”… it conveys to the soul a certain influx divinus… and the knowledge of a higher system of the world, wherein consists precisely its supposed animation of the soul.”
Or to put it another way, the energy of my objective interest turned inward, to my senses and that awakened my inner, or psychic relatedness to both myself and to my world. My whole world became both rational and relational. I became aware of myself in a sense of being part of nature inside this past, that went far beyond myself as a single lifetime. And that this somehow, from now on, just had to be integrated into my life.
So by this quote I suddenly realised exactly what had happened to me. What had happened inside of me. Here it was formulated to me in another way, and before this happened to me, such things would have been impenetrable. Now, it was somewhat surprising to me, because Jung is an unbelievably thorough thinker and i can just about think myself out of a paper cup. But the underlying processes that he described confirmed what had happened to me, and made an absolutely clear image of what i went through at that time. I could never had come even close to be able think about my senses like that.
Anyways, at that moment i learned that as he was absolutely true to his experience, and that he was trying to mediate it as being a thinker of our being. And if one is really true to the flow of life as it passes through us, it will always be understandable if we negotiate it from within ourselves.
Our ability to understand what we are is not dependent on how we navigate. It is dependent on how true we are to the origin of our self when we move from our subjective state to an objective reality. That is also why I have always felt uneasy or uncomfortable with people who are repeatedly moving from one objective form of reality to the next. Because the only thing there, is just this formalised collective personality.
There is no self, no individual relationship to being.
Or once again:
So long as the self is unconscious, it corresponds to Freud’s super-ego and is a source of perpetual moral conflict. If, however, it is withdrawn from projection and is no longer identical with public opinion, then one is truly one’s own yea and nay. The self then functions as a union of opposites and thus constitutes the most immediate experience of the Divine which it is psychologically possible to imagine.
I would not use the word divine myself, but it really says something about the true force of nature that we are exposed to from the inside of our ancestral world.
